If You Could Send One Message Back to Your Teenage Self

Look Science, we're not picky. We don't need to be bodily transported in a sports car, and might not even want to if the 'Terminator' nude-clause end up being true. Give us the time traveling mailbox from that Sandra Bullock movie, and you can take the rest of the month off.
If You Could Send One Message Back to Your Teenage Self

Look Science, we're not picky. We don't need to be bodily transported in a sports car, and might not even want to if the Terminator nude-clause end up being true. Give us the time traveling mailbox from that Sandra Bullock movie, and you can take the rest of the month off. We will never be this easy to please.

We asked our readers to show us how they'd squander the ability to send messages to their teenage selves. The winner is below, but first the runners up ...

CHERISH EVERY MOMENT OF HAVING TOREIOTRO HAIR LIR OF MAitls
onmnoa Dear 16 year old me, of all the thousands of kids you went to school with, you are now friends with exactly 1 of them. You'll make wonderful fr
CRACKEDO Hey Genius, Turns out there's no such thing as a victimless crima TUE Libetty You in 2012 CORRECTIONS GEORGIA DEPT. OF (but not PRISON PULA
il. AT&T 3G 10:54 AM 74% Messages 010011010110... Edit Holy shit, this actually works? This is awesome! Hey, uh, who is this? Don't worry about that.
CRACKEDC COM I don't have timete Twinkies. explain - Don't Just bay H eat th lots antil of Gamble on 2012 em The Just kerp truth them Saperbow apocaly
Verizon 3G 11:11 AM l Messages Past Self Edit OH FUCK THE RUSSIANS INVADED. MOVE OUT OF THE COUNTRY NOW! Who the hell is this? I'M STILL IN THE COUNTR
CRACKED CO Dear Past Me Don't ever wear dreadlocks, it makes you look like a dumbass. The wasp that gol stuck in Head your help 'doesn't help either.
GRACKED CON Oadi BUY APPLE
HAPP hAPPY CRACKED COR O PuRTHDAT use lottery tis 6 12 dollar ticket. e to 702 y 2 31 use by PS. t6 these you lf close wolted anyone 56 B to asks, 34
CRACKEDCOR COM DUIT THE DAMN PHONE DOWN. AND PAY ATTENTION YOURE IN SCHOOL For FUCK'S SAKE. ALSO. AVOID BECKY SANDERS. TRUST ME MANL ITS NOT WORTH IT.
CRACKEDCONM Sarah, This is your future self. Later today, a guy named Matt is going to ask you out. say yes. In ten years he 'llbe a apsychologist mak
4 GOD's SAKS STOP EATTING LED PANT!!!!!! -ME/U CRACKEDCO COMT
Writes awful No, no- poetry, but he's decent in bed 30 actually Witt cheat on you with Jen- waste of 8 months Really, Daddy issues- really into stay a
CRACKED CON READAMESSAGE 11/20193 FROM: You SUBECT: HiadsBi2 <Page 2> SENT ON: Anyway, this next bi t is gonna hard to t OUp trust once S easier. I sh
CRACKED CON Tonight, when she invites for you up coffee. she is not actually asking you for coffee. up DO NOT SAY YOU DON'T DRINK COFFEE!

There are FOUR regular contests for you to choose from. Click on the prompt that catches your fancy, and post your entry in the thread, or submit to all four and quadruple your chances of becoming rich and famous. Winner gets 5,000 pennies.

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