I have been described as being "fabulously handsome" by my peers, and "whiney and desperate for laughs" by my peers that aren't imaginary.

Ha ha, I'm just kidding. They both just call me faggot.

I have pooped myself in a movie theater no less than three times. Twice during the same movie.

If anybody says "Homo Erectus" around me, I laugh for an amount of time that makes other people deny knowing me.

Now I'm wishing that I chose different facts about myself to put here.

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