philyra Cracked photo
  • Real Name: philyra
  • Location: Cottonville, Southern USA
  • Member Since: May 10th, 2010 12:09 pm
  • Last Seen: September 29th, 2015 06:25 pm
  • Personal tag line: You say nerd like it's a bad thing.
  • Message board posts

About philyra

I was raised by cyborgs on the planet Platsog IV until I ran away to join the Stellar Alliance Force Fighters at age 7. I earned many medals for valor and bravery, and one for Creative Use of Explosive Fanny Packs. I became a General at age 11, and chose to retire to the Serenity Colony on Vegra IX. I lived there until the colony was destroyed by an army of Sarah Palin Clone-bots. I now live on Earth in the guise of a mild-mannered stay-at-home-mom while planning my rise to power in this solar system. That should be an easy task with the help of the Death Star I'm building in my back yard.


No articles found.


No columns found.


No videos found.

Account Tools

Cracked Friends

Choosing to "Like" Cracked has no side effects, so what's the worst that could happen?

The Weekly Hit List

Sit back... Relax... We'll do all the work.
Get a weekly update on the best at Cracked. Subscribe now!