Graduated first in my class at MIT (My Institute of Tastelessness) Was awarded the prestigious Shits in the Pants award for a total 33 shits in the pants I've made people have over the years. Grew up in the subsubsuburbs (also known as the middle of nowhere) I have six children named Uhm, I don't know, What Do You Think Honey, I'm Not Good At This, Crap I Can't Think Of One, and Shit. As you can tell my girl and I just went with the first thing I said when pressed for a name for our children.

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