I am a Venezuelan immigrant, and considering the situation down there is as fucked as ever, I'd go ahead and call me a political refugee too. Came to the States when I was 12, learned English in like 5 months by watching "Ace Ventura" four times a day, playing N64 and roleplaying on online forums, and as soon as I got my bearings on this wonderfully whack-ass language, I did what any natural-born American would: Talk shit on the internet. More than a decade later, that American dream lives on: to speak the ideas of the masses and bring the absurdities of life to the eyes and ears of the world, so as to appr-- Okay, you know what? Stop reading about me, creeper. Yeah, oh what? "Oh I-- Oh, I mean, it's just your About Me sect-- I mean... oh... uh..." Yeah, get the hell outta here.

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