Mynamesnotwitty

Mynamesnotwitty's Cracked photo
  • Real Name: Ava Tard
  • Location: Currently terraforming other planets.
  • Member Since: January 29th, 2010
  • Last Seen: August 2nd, 2010 3:15 pm
  • Personal tag line: Sit your ass down in that chair and drink your GODDAMN TEA!!
  • Message board posts: 9

About Mynamesnotwitty

I make up the 2% of Americans who dont know how to use percentages. My motto in life is "Anything can be fucked" I should do well as a politician. In high school I was voted most likely to , I whited out the part about it saying fuck up. I spent 3 years as a travelling salesman before I was locked up for human sex trafficking, bunch of pussies, thats the last time I take my sisters on a "vacation". My diet consists of Herbal teas, oatmeal, gallons of high fructose corn syrup (always goes down smooth) and Marijua..walnuts. Right, walnuts. I listen to folk music simply to prove to my friends i'm not a fag, I forgot my reasoning for that, what was I saying? oh yea, tits. Tits are great, I had a girlfriend with BIG tits once, I named one of them Bowser, she stopped calling me after that.

Articles

No articles found.

Columns

No columns found.

Videos

No videos found.

Account Tools

Cracked Friends

Choosing to "Like" Cracked has no side effects, so what's the worst that could happen?

The Weekly Hit List

Sit back... Relax... We'll do all the work.
Get a weekly update on the best at Cracked. Subscribe now!