I am super cool and really interesting. There are several concrete facts to back this up. Asking others to confirm this only shows your lack of trust in others and there for you yourself should not be trusted.

Also this;

Oh man, I had the weirdest day at the store today. I was walking in while reading "Cracked" over the internet on my Cell phone. (cause chicks totally dig guys who are all teckie... right? I know I'm right. Right?) Anyway, as I'm walking in the automated door there's this kid walking out. What is it about kids that they can see you in front of them and assume that they have the ability to just go right through you like a ghost or Jubilee? But I wasn't paying attention so I basically smacked right into him. Then he screams "Hey look out A_shole!" I snapped out of my reading to look down and suddenly blurted "Hey! Your not a kid, your a midget." Then the midget says " I'm a f_cking Dwarf you sh_thead!" then he like suddenly makes a flinching move and I realize he's going to punch me in the crotch. I unleash a mighty battle cry that sounded like "Gwah-eah..." as I awkwardly slam my knees together trying to tuck my junk in. Out of basic survival reaction I reach out and push his massive face with my hand, the elf suddenly flopped back wards and landed flat on his back. I have never seen one fall down before, it reminded me of a turtle. "You f_cking d_ck!" the munchkin screamed. Then out of no where a store employee runs and yells at me "Hey, leave that kid alone!" then he pause and says "Hey! Your not a kid your a midget." I started to laugh but suddenly that little turd punched me right in the balls, like UFC Superman style and then waddled out the door. Then the clerk started to laugh. I didn't think it was funny.

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