Me? I'm just the token black guy. If ever there needs to be a 'n-word' said, I'll be there. If ever there's a woman with a sizable rear end, I'll be there to stare inappropriately and say...black guy stuff. If ever the cops need someone to single out at a party, I'll be in my car with a hooker. Have I inspired you yet, bitches?! No? Shit. Well, maybe I should put something meaningful here like, y'know, how I'm new to Cracked and don't think I'm at all funny enough to contribute...but I'm the token black guy. I can shrug off that kinda responsibility as a one-dimensional archetype AND I get to use conjunctions that don't exist like 'kinda'. It's a good deal. Of course, I had to sell my soul first, but I've got enough James Brown records to compensate.

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