ClintBeastwood

ClintBeastwood Cracked photo
  • Real Name: ClintBeastwood
  • Location: The Black Forest.
  • Member Since: July 1st, 2008 05:59 pm
  • Last Seen: February 18th, 2009 03:05 pm
  • Personal tag line: Shiiiit....If I knew it was gonna be that kinda party, I'da stuck my dick in the mashed potatoes......
  • Message board posts: 0

About ClintBeastwood

Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Some times he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy, the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical, summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds, pretty standard really. At the age of 12 I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum, it's breathtaking, I suggest you try it.

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