"Humour is an act of defiance..we must laugh in the face of our helplessness against the forces of nature...or go insane.." (doug stanhope)
Privateer...Pirate....Highwayman...Mercenary...Buccaneer Englishman....A thanatophobiac who looks on the bright side...For years I fooled the medical establishment in to thinking I was one half of a set of identical twins, that is until I was rumbled on having a second set of clothes hidden in the waiting room.

Yes Iv lead a varied and some would say eventful life,

After beating a murder rap in Bosnia, which cost me 30'000 Paso's to the right greasy crime lord controled judge stoodge, i went on to be a drug inforcer for a high brow cartel in south america, that is until i decided to moved in to the more lucrative business of white slavery, where for a price, i lured young white western girls in to the sex trade, selling them on to oil rich arabs in there dusty desert caravans, who use and abuse there milky white bodies as they desire,

Apart from that, a normal guy really, who likes to keeps his hand in with a bit of gun running and drugs racketeering, i support myself mainly though working nights as a pole dancer and for MI6 as a honeytrap, gleaning information essential for the security of the nation from rich middle-east Princes who rewarded me with presents of diamonds cocaine and west-end flats,
Yet when bored i join Madonna for world tours before mucking in as a coder on the human genome project,

Married three times, although widowed by my own hand twice, i live alone in a black mountain top retreat, with my batman 'theroo' and my hunting dogs 'Caesar Andronicus' 'Tiberius Maximus'and 'shep' I seek nothing now but a painless death unlike the meny i have meted out, and for my ashes to be rubbed vigorously in to a young virgins skin on her wedding night.

So as always keep in contact, as i like to hear from old school friends dead or incarcerated, aspecialy white single girls with no family or ties, who like to travel,

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