The 20 Most Secretly Brilliant Stupid Criminals

#14. Tim Allen: Cocaine Transporter, Rat

While Tim Allen was building his fame in the stand-up community in the late '70s, he hit a little bit of a road bump.

Allen was in an airport, minding his own business, looking to get from point A to point B just like everybody else. Unlike anybody else in the airport at the time, however, Allen was trying to take with him a staggering 1.4-pounds of cocaine, which our street connections tell us is enough to get you high forever.

He was caught when drug-sniffing dogs at every airport within a 100-mile radius started going berserk, and life imprisonment loomed. He snitched on every single drug dealer he knew, which reduced his sentence to a mere three to seven years, and he was released 28 months later.


Regardless of the arrest, that's an awesome porn 'stache.

The Secretly Brilliant:

Allen went on to be a huge star as a stand-up comedian, and by the mid-'90s, he was an A-list celebrity (nobody really knows why, yet). At the pinnacle of his success, he starred in the Toy Story films. Making the jump from coke dealer to informant to family movie actor is something very few have done successfully.

Sure, his work in those Christmas movies wasn't exactly inspired. You try acting with one eye on the tatted up craft services guy who looks like he might have some friends on the inside.

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