Cracked Archive - Sports
The Olympic Torch Got To Japan, Now What?
Made it there 0.01 seconds too late.
- Authors
- By Luis Prada
- Published
- Comments
- 19
WWE Minus Audiences Equals Shakespearean Theatre
Dost thou knoweth what thine Rock be cooketh?
- Authors
- By Cedric Voets
- Published
- Comments
- 0
We Regret To Inform You That Trump Supporters Have Their Very Own 'Hamilton'
And it's probably the worst mix of politics and theatre since Lincoln decided to catch a play.
- Authors
- By Mark Hill
- Published
- Comments
- 67
An Old Zamboni Driver Won His Pro Hockey Debut
Hockey is a sport built mostly for fights and inspiring stories.
- Authors
- By Isaac Cabe
- Published
- Comments
- 0
Man Suing The NFL Because The Halftime Show Damned His Eternal Soul
If you were Shakira and Jennifer Lopez, wouldn’t you consider this a glowing review?
- Authors
- By Luis Prada
- Published
- Comments
- 2
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Finally, The NFL Draft Will Give Players The Option To Drown
Why simply walk, when you can trudge through dirty Vegas hotel fountain water?
- Authors
- By Luis Prada
- Published
- Comments
- 0
The Antonio Brown Saga, For People Who Don't Watch Football
The NFL is the world's weirdest soap opera.
- Authors
- By Luis Prada
- Published
- Comments
- 0
You Are Not Prepared For These Awful New XFL Teams
Remember the XFL? Anybody?
- Authors
- By Luis Prada
- Published
- Comments
- 3
The Owner Of The LA Clippers Is A Joyful Screaming Man
The greatest hits of Mr. Steve Ballmer, folks.
- Authors
- By Luis Prada
- Published
- Comments
- 0
5 Underreported Dumb Annoyances Pro Athletes Put Up With
Being at the top of your game can really drag you down.
- Authors
- By James Kinneen, Mike Bedard, RG Jordan
- Published
- Comments
- 100
11 Real Mascots People Inexplicably Thought Were A Good Idea
These cartoony creeps got a lot more jeers than cheers.
- Authors
- By James Kinneen, Julia Lange, Marvin Bea, Christian Markle
- Published
- Comments
- 122
How The 'Major League' Movies Predicted Modern Baseball
Sorry, we're not counting 'Major League: Back To The Minors.'
- Authors
- By Dan Hopper
- Published
- Comments
- 43
5 Mind-Blowingly Stupid Ways Pro Athletes Tried To Cheat
Some elite athletes will do anything they can to gain a competitive edge.
- Authors
- By Mark Hill
- Published
- Comments
- 99
6 Terrible Super Bowl Ads You Won't Believe Actually Ran
All Subway ads with Jared are far, far creepier now.
- Authors
- By Chris Radomile
- Published
- Comments
- 207
The 7 Most Insane Dick Moves Ever Pulled By Sports Fans
Scholars thousands of years from now will pore over millions of minutes of televised sporting events and conclude we were a bunch of assholes.
- Authors
- By Isaac Cabe
- Published
- Comments
- 287