Cracked Archive - News
'Man Cave' Discovered Under Grand Central Station Platform, Because the MTA is the MTA
Move over, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, there's a new underground lair in town...
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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- 21
Ikea's Newest Influencer Is a CGI Instagram Model
Ikea should probably start selling black mirrors after this ad campaign.
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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- Comments
- 15
Man Dies From Eating Too Much Licorice Because, Well, Murphy's Law
Are you one of those certifiably weird people that actually like licorice? We've got some bad news, people.
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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- Comments
- 23
Guy Who Claims To Be Second Coming of Christ Arrested In Russia
The second coming of Christ as an ex-traffic cop was not on my 2020 bingo, but here we are I guess.
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- By Carly Tennes
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- 40
A 12-Pack Of Interesting Movie & General 'Now You Know' Facts
It's time to quench your brain.
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- By Chris Pauls, AM Smiley
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- 35
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Dolly Parton's 'Jolene' Works As A Stealth Lesbian Love Song
Seriously folks, that Jolene is one fine looking gal.
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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- Comments
- 27
Who Is Responsible For The First Selfie? A Scientific Investigation
Seriously, is it Reese Witherspoon? Some dead guy from the 1800s? My mom?
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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- Comments
- 9
Asbestos, Canada Struggles to Find a Name Better Than 'Asbestos'
Intercourse, Pennsylvania has some stiff competition.
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- By Carly Tennes
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- 18
The Mods of New Jersey's Official Twitter Account Deserves A Raise
Yes, the northeastern state of New Jersey, lovingly dubbed 'The Armpit of America' has a crackerjack Twitter.
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- By Carly Tennes
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- 11
5 Recent News Stories Which Wound Up Having Bizarre Twists
Stories keep evolving, revealing layer after layer of weirdness.
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- By Ryan Menezes
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- 49
Flights To Nowhere Are Now A Thing Because 2020
All the stress of air travel, without any of the vacation destinations!
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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- Comments
- 11
The Actual Reason Costco's Hot Dog And Soda Combo Is $1.50
Several billion years from now, a hot dog and a soda will cost $1.50 at Costco.
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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- 25
Ruth Bader Ginsburg Played Fantasy Baseball (And Talked Trash)
Even RBG had her savage moments, especially when it came to fantasy sports.
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- By Carly Tennes
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- 16
A Bunny Expert Classifying Rabbits Is Oddly Hypnotic, Wholesome
Sometimes you just gotta watch a calm man talk about the roundness of little bunnies.
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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- 8
'Hype Houses' Are Just Zoomer Communes
I'll take 'Late-Stage Capitalism' for 500, Alex.
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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- 13