Cracked Archive
5 Bitter Truths About Chocolate
While we'd like to continue to believe that chocolate comes from a purple-garbed man in a whimsical factory, the real chocolate world is far darker and far harder than we ever would have thought. Though the general disregard for children is about the same.
- Authors
- By Paul K Pickett
- Published
- Comments
- 646
The 6 Most Misguided Causes Ever Made Famous by Celebrities
We wouldn't mind if celebrity causes were simply vapid or silly. But sometimes, they're down right evil.
- Authors
- By Will Kriegshauser
- Published
- Comments
- 2585
The 9 Stupidest Superhero Secret Identities
A trench coat isn't much of a disguise when the rest of your visible body is clearly made of rocks.
- Authors
- By Maxwell Yezpitelok
- Published
- Comments
- 919
4 Nobel Prize Winners Who Were Clearly Insane
Geniuses tend to only be geniuses on one subject. Just as you don't ask Peyton Manning for soccer tips, you don't ask a veterinarian to do your prostate exam. And you really don't want to ask William Shockley about genetics.
- Authors
- By Christina H
- Published
- Comments
- 542
6 Completely Legal Ways The Cops Can Screw You
We are so lucky to be living in an era of law where suspect interrogations with live cobras tied to the ends of nightsticks are no longer common. Unfortunately, there are still many colorful ways the police can royally screw you while Lady Justice shrugs.
- Authors
- By Cezary Jan Strusiewicz
- Published
- Comments
- 1685
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How to Decide Whether to Tell the Painful Truth [COMIC]
Honesty is not always the best policy. For instance, when you're talking to your boss, honesty is almost never a good idea
- Authors
- By Scott Meyer
- Published
- Comments
- 193
The 6 Worst Jobs Ever (Were Done by Children)
Back in the day, people had only one reason to produce offspring: To force them to do the abhorrently awful work no grown person would dare to.
- Authors
- By Shelby Fero
- Published
- Comments
- 630
The 5 Most Absurd Video Games Starring Rock Stars
Being a famous musician comes with a lot of perks. Throngs of adoring fans enamored with your every move. More sex and drugs than one person should ever have access to. And, apparently, the means to get completely idiotic video games commissioned in your name.
- Authors
- By Adam Tod Brown
- Published
- Comments
- 322
Cracked Round-Up: Bi-Annual STD Screening Edition
- Authors
- By CRACKED Staff
- Published
- Comments
- 6
The 6 Saddest Attempts to Follow Up Pop Culture Classics
Just because you've created one masterpiece doesn't mean everything you touch is going to be gold.
- Authors
- By Maxwell Yezpitelok
- Published
- Comments
- 413
The 9 Most Statistically Terrifying Days On the Calendar
There are days that everyone knows to be cautious on and then there are these days. Just lurking in the shadows. Waiting to murder you dead.
- Authors
- By Jack O'Brien
- Published
- Comments
- 622
6 Things From History Everyone Pictures Incorrectly: Classic
Unsurprisingly, our image of the past is largely made up of Hollywood inventions, propaganda and uneducated guesses.
- Authors
- By Alexander L. Hoffman
- Published
- Comments
- 2199
Battle of the Sexes: Judging The 8 Most Iconic Bras Ever Worn
You know how people always bitch about science taking time out of its day to solve inconsequential problems while a cure for cancer is still nowhere in sight? Well this is a lot like that. Instead of using this prime comedy real estate to shed light on one of the many issues currently plaguing our great nation, we're talking about titties.
- Authors
- By Adam Tod Brown, Kristi Harrison
- Published
- Comments
- 228
How to Explain Men's Emotions: A Useful Analogy [COMIC]
Contrary to popular belief, the frozen burrito is not the best frozen food metaphor for explaining male emotions.
- Authors
- By Scott Meyer
- Published
- Comments
- 272
The 6 Most Gigantic Everything in the History of War
You have to be amazed by what humans can accomplish when they really, really want to kill each other.
- Authors
- By Jacopo della Quercia
- Published
- Comments
- 693