Hulk Hogan

Terry Bollea as he was known by before he became a god was a man way ahead of his time,struggling as a undercard wrestler he decided he needed to suck a little dick to get ahead. Enter Vince McMahon Senior,after taking a world champion shot in the mouth Hulkamania was off and running and there was nothing anyone could do to stop it.

Born out of the ashes of sperm and male pattern baldness The Hulk had arrived to the WWF and was kicking ass and stepping on the little people to get ahead.Hulk learned early on in his carrer that it was best not to put new stars over because nobody cared about anyone else but him anyways. This was The Fucking Hogan Era brother!

World titles came to him like flies on shit,he was the strongest man on earth.Beating Giants, Ultimate Warriors, and Macho men alike.Once the mother fucker stopped an EarthQuake with his bare hands. He also saved the world from the bat shit insane American turncoat Sgt.Slaughter.Not to mention taking out his entire Terriost Organization single handed.

THE BELOW VIDEO IS MY REASON TO LIVE

This soon began to get tiresome for the Hulkster,and he went in search for greener pastures..............

Hulk Hogan was a Global Phenom by the time he decided to bite the tits that feed of the WWF and moved on to form a alliance with Tv Tycoon and Jane Fonda Fucker Ted Turner.

Mr.Turner being the genius that he was decided to give Hogan a Welcome wagon the likes that have never been seen before, A PARADE THROUGH DISNEY!!! How Often does that happen?

Clearly the steak and potatoes of the company Hogan made every other wrestler look like complete shit compared to his awesome power and endless arsenal of moves. He quickly devoured the entire roster and televison ratings began to decline. Why? Because nobody cared about anyone other than the Hulkster Brother! When Ratings took a downslide Hogan always decided to take time off for some reason, but when he returned it was always in the middle of a hot new feud and for some strange reason it looked like he was the reason the people were tuning in.

During one of these well timed vacations Hogan visted the DeathStar and Emperor Palpatine convinced him to Join the Dark Side. Thus becoming Darth Hulk, and ushering in a new era of sports entertainment. Paired with a fellow dark side cocksucker Eric Bishoff, Resident alcoholic Scott Hall and a injury prone Giant Kevin Nash the plans were set in motion for the New World Order to begin.

Hulk Hogan clearly had his fair share of enemies.....*see below video

The N.W.O as it were took absolute control of WcW,under Hogans rule these guys were out to make a impact on the wrestling world. As was mentioned many times in the past Hogan and his posse of sterotypes killed every WcW wrestler on the roster. Realizing that Hogan was the cool kid to be around membership requests were coming in left and right to be in this club. Hogan was very selective in picking his Stable just right and narrowed it down to 10 Divisions of the N.W.O with 75 members each. Such N.W.O choice cuts included Brutus BeefCake,Virgil and Horrace Hogan.

Sadly the retarded viewers did not see things Hogan's way after a certain amount of time and they begin to tire of the N.W.O's antics. They begin switching stations over to the WWF and not watching the 22 hours of quality N.W.O Programming provided by TBS every day.

Hulk Hogan soon took another vacation from WcW and never came back.The company Folded without his mere presence and Vince McMahon bought WcW for a $50 dollar WalMart gift card and a carton of smokes.....Menthol. I Personally think they paid too much, anyways.........................................

After The fall of WcW Hogan sat at home for quite some time and still got paid from his fat long term contract that Ted Turner had to pay even after folded. I like to picture Crowded House "Don't Dream it's over" playing in Turner's head to this very day.

Let's take a point form look at THE IMMORTAL's accomplishments since:

• Returned to form the NWO in the WWE, and boy that did'nt get old fast.
• Started a Reality show that showed the Hogan's 100% in there natural life,Fuck scripted reality!
• Inducted Into the hall of fame for a Fake Sport.....wrestling in case you were'nt paying attention
• Had very uncomfortable thing for his Daughter, making Joe Simpson not feel as bad.
• Cheated on his wife Linda with a Brooke Clone
• Got Divorced
• Wanted to team up with O.J Simpson and murder his ex wife and her 12 year old boyfriend.
• Remember Hulk Hogan Celebrity wrestling? Me either...............
• Lives happily with Brooke and makes the rest of the world shudder in disgust