Sandra Fluke

There is no proof that Sandra Fluke has any desire to screw people for money. There is no record of her being arrested for being a prostitute. Of course, 'screw for cash' does get confusing when you are a Georgetown law student.

There it is. The new shocked face of trashiness.

No one else will ever have more famous twenty year old brunette sex in their 20s in DC.

Contraception is only good 97 out of 100 times a month. NO ONE can keep beating those odds forever.

Just The Facts

  1. The debate over public contraception in the United States actually goes back to the nineteenth century.
  2. The recents history of young brunettes in Washington D. C. (Monica Lewinsky, Chandra Levy, Sandra Fluke) shows that young brunettes can have a very good time in our nations capitol. It does not mean that good time will end well.
  3. Testifying that you are 'going broke' buying contraception can have negative consequences. Of course, calling someone a 'slut,' 'whore,' and 'prostitute' over national radio can have similiarly adverse effects.

Some Historical Perspective

In order to get a real perspective on why Sandra Fluke was publically called a 'whore' a mind numbing 46 times by Rush Limbaugh over radio in a three day span, you have to go back to a time before there was radio. There is however not a time before fat moralistic killjoys in this country. As a matter of pure fact, Limbaugh has a long way to go before he even approaches the annals of balding moralist Anthony Comstock. Anthony Comstock was born in New Canaan, Connecticut in the 1840s. Armed with strict Victorian values, as a young man Comstock was absolutely appalled by the horrors of the Civil War. He was not so much appalled by the injustice of slavery or man's inhumanity to man. What really got Comstock's goat was the widespread use of tobbacco, curse words, and alcohol among his fellow soldiers. Really, what happened to the Army we all knew and loved?

Comstock made bringing the rest of the United States up to his moral standards mission to the grave...and beyond. Killing a man in battle was one thing. The fact that that man may have masturbated to a dirty picture the night before was a completely different matter. Comstock made the curbing of lewd behavior his lifelong goal. Imagine a 21 year old trying to convince fellow soldiers not to drink. The primary target of Comstock's moral crusade? The United States Post Office. Comstock became convinced that the good name of the United States Post Office was being corrupted and defiled as nothing more than a passageway for lewd materials and porn. The modern equivalent would be someone leading a holy jihad against porn on the internet. Everyone knows that porn is there. Most people just don't have any real intention of stopping porn on the internet. Most people seem overly concerned with getting more porn on the internet.

People in Victorian societies (even if they weren't in England) were still pretty hip to cast out any and all seen and unseen devils. Anthony Comstock found a willing audience for what would later be referred to as 'Comstock Laws.' 'Comstock Laws' were the type of thing passed in the fictional city of Bomont to rid the world of dancing and rock and roll music. Hopefully, before you passed these laws, you at least got a show tune sung to you by Robert Preston or at least Phil Hartman. What was the Comstock law and how did it shape the national discussion of contraception?

Glad you asked....

"

Be it enacted... That whoever, within the District of Columbia or any of the Territories of the United States...shall sell...or shall offer to sell, or to lend, or to give away, or in any manner to exhibit, or shall otherwise publish or offer to publish in any manner, or shall have in his possession, for any such purpose or purposes, an obscene book, pamphlet, paper, writing, advertisement, circular, print, picture, drawing or other representation, figure, or image on or of paper or other material, or any cast instrument, or other article of an immoral nature, or any drug or medicine, or any article whatever, for the prevention of conception, or for causing unlawful abortion, or shall advertise the same for sale, or shall write or print, or cause to be written or printed, any card, circular, book, pamphlet, advertisement, or notice of any kind, stating when, where, how, or of whom, or by what means, any of the articles in this section�can be purchased or obtained, or shall manufacture, draw, or print, or in any wise make any of such articles, shall be deemed guilty of a misdemeanor, and on conviction thereof in any court of the United States...he shall be imprisoned at hard labor in the penitentiary for not less than six months nor more than five years for each offense, or fined not less than one hundred dollars nor more than two thousand dollars, with costs of court."

How was all of this to be enforced? Comstock himself took on the role of a 'Postal Inspector.' Comstock took no pay for this role but continued his holy mission until the day that he died. That did not effect how he did his job though. Comstock did in fact gather evidence and successfully prosecute thousands of cases under the Comstock acts. To insure his crusade would not end with his death, one of his last young followers was a man by the name of J. Edgar Hoover. If you ever watch Family Guy, letting Anthony Comstock be a Postal Inspector was very much akin to letting Francis Griffin run a toy factory for you.

Of course, no one is without enemies. For every Batman, there is a Joker. For every Anthony Comstock, there is a Margaret Sanger. Sanger was like a snake to Comstock's mongoose. Or, it might be the other way around. I'm not very good with animals. Sanger, a former nurse and noted eugenicist, made it her lifes work to inform the world of contraception, birth control, and hopefully have fewer minorities around to preach the word too. Of course, spreading the word about contraception and birth control (especially if it was mailed out) ran afoul of the Comstock laws. More not caring about Comstock's laws than not knowing them, Sanger started importing diaphragms from Europe. She also started publications such as The Woman Rebel, What Every Girl Should Know, and Birth Control Review. It was a nifty little ditty called Family Limitation that would get Sanger directly convicted over the Comstock Act. She was offered a lighter sentence for an agreeance that shw would not distribute such materials again. Sanger told the judge that she had no respect for the law and was thrown in a workhouse for thirty days. Sanger would go on to found Planned Parenthood and become instrumental the development of the first birth control pill. Sanger also saw to it that many of the Comstock Laws were overturned. This was accomplished primarily to the fact that Sanger happened to outlive Comstock.

However, between Sanger and Comstock... the dye was cast onthe moral debate of contraception that rages to this day.

Every Sperm Is Sacred, Every Sperm is Good.

In the 1983 film Monty Python and the Meaning of Life, the British comedy troupe Monty Python lays out the Catholic Churches' very real moral opposition to cotraception through ... what else?... a really catchy show tune. Here is a sampling of the lyrics...

DAD:
There are Jews in the world.
There are Buddhists.
There are Hindus and Mormons, and then
There are those that follow Mohammed, but
I've never been one of them.

I'm a Roman Catholic,
And have been since before I was born,
And the one thing they say about Catholics is:
They'll take you as soon as you're warm.

You don't have to be a six-footer.
You don't have to have a great brain.
You don't have to have any clothes on. You're
A Catholic the moment Dad came,

Because

Every sperm is sacred.
Every sperm is great.
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite irate.

CHILDREN:
Every sperm is sacred.
Every sperm is great.
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite irate.

GIRL:
Let the heathen spill theirs
On the dusty ground.
God shall make them pay for
Each sperm that can't be found.

Though the Church has never been in favor of contraception, Catholics can claim that they enjoyed Protestant support on this issue up until 1930. 1930 was when the Anglican Church announced that contraception would be OK 'in some instances.' The Biblical discussion about contraception actually goes back to the Book a Genesis and a strapping young lad named Onan. Onan defied Jewish law by attempting to not impregnate his dead brother's wife. Lets read....

Genesis 38:6-10

6: And Judah took a wife for Er his firstborn, whose name was Tamar.
7: And Er, Judah's firstborn, was wicked in the sight of the Lord; and the Lord slew him.
8: And Judah said unto Onan, Go in unto thy brother's wife, and marry her, and raise up seed to thy brother.
9: And Onan knew that the seed should not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in unto his brother's wife, that he spilled it on the ground, lest that he should give seed to his brother.
10: And the thing which he did displeased the Lord: wherefore he slew him also.

Thus the Lord God Jehovah left very little doubt of his thoughts on the matter of attempting to lose your junk on the ground by straight up killing Onan. In the account of Onan, there seems to be very little doubt about where God stands on the matter of spraying life giving juices in the sand. Had he instead fertlized Tamar's wanting womb, he would not be alive today but would have made it a few more seasons. The Church has never waivered from this opinion. According to Paul VI in his landmark address on Humanae Vitae (human life), contraception is defined as ""any action which, either in anticipation of the conjugal act [sexual intercourse], or in its accomplishment, or in the development of its natural consequences, proposes, whether as an end or as a means, to render procreation impossible" (Humanae Vitae 14). According to catholic.com, this includes but is apparently not limited to " sterilization, condoms and other barrier methods, spermicides, coitus interruptus (withdrawal method), the Pill, and all other such methods. " Seemingly, at no time has the Catholic Church taken 'being challenged by and losing a fistfight with God in the manner of Onan' off the table.

If not in agreeance, you can at least see why Catholic are a liitle put off by having (even free to them) contraception included in the buffet table of their health care smorgasbord. So remember, in the history of America contraception as well as birth control has gone from a lewd act to discuss to being forced upon a Church to provide as medical care in less than a hundred years.

Look At Me... I'm Sandra Dee... Lousy With... Oh, Never Mind...

In 2012, the discussion over contraception in a federally mandated health plan received the input of one Sandra Fluke. Fluke is a Georgetown law student who graduated from Cornell in 2003. She was active the prevention of domestic violence in New York state for five years before pursuing her law degree. After much wrangling between Democrats (in favor) and Republicans (opposed) as to whether she was even qualified to testify before Congress on the matter of birth control, Fluke did in fact give testimony on February 16th, 2012. The hearing was innocently titled ' 'Lines Crossed: Separation Of Church & State. Has The Obama Admin. Trampled On Freedom Of Religion?'

Fluke testified that ""Without insurance coverage, contraception can cost a woman over $3,000 during law school. For a lot of students who, like me, are on public interest scholarships, thats practically an entire summer's salary. Forty percent of female students Georgetown law report struggling financially as a result of this policy. One told us of how embarassed she felt when she was standing at the pharmacy counter, learning for the first time that contraception wasn't covered and had to walk away because she couldn't afford it. Students like her have no choice but to go without contraception."

The 3000 dollar figure was eye popping. According to plannedparenthood.org - the cost of the birth control pill itself if between 15-50 dollars each month. Lets assume the high end on that one. Law School is a three year program. Over the course of three years, the pill would cost 1800 on the high end. This is, again, according to plannedparenthood.org ( http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/birth-control/birth-control-pill-4228.htm ). That leaves about 1200 dollars on the table. Trojan condoms list price at 24 dollars for a pack of 36 condoms. Lets assume that you just threw the rest of the money into condoms. That would be 75 boxes of 36 condoms over the course of three years. This would be in addition to birth control pills. These are of course extra lubricated. That is a total of 2700 condoms in the course of a three year period. Keep in mind that if you are throwing in a leap year, that equals out to be 1096 days. Assuming an average usage of birth control and condoms, you could be protected in two ways from getting pregnant and still be averaging sex 2.46 times a day for three years This is if you spent 3000 dollars on contraceptives in that three year span. According to the woman, if you allowed that she was not predisposed to sex during a menstrual period and took a fifth of the days off, you would be looking at 819 sexually active days during that time frame. The time off could then safely up your average to 3.3 times per day for three years using two methods of birth control over the span of your law school life. Any more sex almost would threaten to veer into Rob Low territory. There afre of course other methods. For instance, there is the depovera shot once every three months. Again planned parenthood's own site states that the high end of this shot it 75 pus the fee for examination. We'll be generous and put the total cost of this at 200 dollars once every three months. That would be 2400 over the course of three years. The remain 600 dollars would only buy you 900 condoms in this span. Unfortunately, under this scenario (for three grand) the college girl on the move could only afford to have double protected sex (assuming she did all the condom buying) a little over once a day on four fifths of the days over a three year span.

Moving on through Fluke's testimony ...

"Just on Tuesday, a married female student told me she had to stop using contraception because she couldn't afford it any longer. You might respond that contraception is accessible in lots of other ways. Unfortunately, that's not true. Women's health clinic provide vital medical services, but as the Guttmacher Institute has doncumented, clinics are unable to meet the crushing demand for these services. Clinics are closing and women are being forced to go without. How can Congress consider allowing even more employers and institutions to refuse contraceptive coverage and then respond that non-profit clinics should step up to take care of the resulting medical crisis, particularly when so many legislators are attempting to defund those very same clinics?"

Barring the fact that if you examine the following document http://www.archives.gov/exhibits/charters/constitution_transcript.html and all of its amendments, you will not find the words 'health care' or 'contraception' in there one single time. You might reasonably conclude that Congress does actually have the right to pick and choose what it will and will not fund. Its a radical concept but one that probably should not be lost on a law student. Fluke ended her testimony talking about a fellow student who could not get medication for an ovarian cyst because it was seen as a contraception. She goes on to stat that the student needed to have an ovary removed. At one point, Fluke even mentioned that the student was homosexual and would not need the birth control for other reasons. She finished by reminding the panel that the loss of the ovary would make it harder for the homosexual student to become a mom at some later point. Presumably, the mom portion would then be through some sort of artificial inseminaton or a later heterosexual relationship. Fluke also states her belief that her support of contraception at a Catholic University is not 'at war with Catholicism.' A careful reading of the previous section might differ with that opinion. Even despite a few logical fallacies as well as a rambling testimony, Fluke could not and would not be prepared for what was next. Of course, she also discussed a married woman that could not longer afford contraception either. The Church has been rather adamant on its opinion of that one as well. You almost have to wonder how worried Patrick Ewing was about contraception when he was at Georgetown.

Rush To Judgment

Once they were ahold of Fluke's testimony, the conservative blogosphere as well as talk radio blew up over Fluke's testimony. Fluke probably had no idea she was offending any one's morals with her equivalent of a testimony that lit up like Helen Gurley Brown's Sex And The Single Girl in 1962. Conservative commentators such as Glenn Beck, Bill O'Reilly and Sean Hannity openly criticized Sandra Fluke's testimony. This all paled in comparison to a three day ongoing rant by conservative talk show host Rush Limbaugh. All told, between Febraury 28th and March 1st 2012, Limbaugh called Fluke some variant of 'slut,' 'whore,' or 'prostitute' nearly 50 times in three days. A sampling of what Limbaugh saud reads as follows.

"What does it say about the college coed Susan Fluke [sic], who goes before a congressional committee and essentially says that she must be paid to have sex? What does that make her? It makes her a slut, right? It makes her a prostitute. She wants to be paid to have sex. .Can you imagine if you're her parents how proud of Sandra Fluke you would be? Your daughter goes up to a congressional hearing conducted by the Botox-filled Nancy Pelosi and testifies she's having so much sex she can't afford her own birth control pills and she agrees that Obama should provide them, or the Pope. I'm going broke having sex. I need government to provide me condoms and contraception. It's not fair. Ms. Fluke, have you ever heard of not having sex? Have you ever heard of not having sex so often? So, Ms. Fluke and the rest of you feminazis, here's the deal. If we are going to pay for your contraceptives, and thus pay for you to have sex, we want something for it, and I'll tell you what it is. We want you to post the videos online so we can all watch. This is no different than if somebody knocked on my door that I don't know and said, 'You know what? I'm out of money. I can't afford birth-control pills, and I'm supposed to have sex with three guys tonight. She's having sex so frequently that she can't afford all the birth-control pills that she needs. That's what she's saying."

Those would just be the highlights. There was an insananeous backlash to Limbaugh's comments. Republican politicians such as Mitt Romney and House Speaker (R) John Boener decried Rush's comments as inappropiate. There was also an online campaign for not only sponsors to leave Limbaugh's show but also for Clear Channel Communications to drop Limbaugh altogether. Now, it has to be said here that many of the people calling for Limbaugh to leave the airwaves would have probably done the same with all the provocation of it being a Tuesday. That is just the kind of emotion tha Limbaugh tends to stir up. Especially disturbing was the notion that Limaugh might be OK with the entire enterprise if there was simply more government sponsored porn on the internet. President Barack Obama called Fluke to personally express shock as well as condolence for her treatment on the air. 45 or so and counting sponsors did actually leave Rush's program however Clear Channel has stated they will stand behind Rush. Limbaugh is under contract until 2016. Limbaugh issued the following apology through his personal website

"For over 20 years, I have illustrated the absurd with absurdity, three hours a day, five days a week. In this instance, I chose the wrong words in my analogy of the situation. I did not mean a personal attack on Ms. Fluke. / I think it is absolutely absurd that during these very serious political times, we are discussing personal sexual recreational activities before members of Congress. I personally do not agree that American citizens should pay for these social activities. What happened to personal responsibility and accountability? Where do we draw the line? If this is accepted as the norm, what will follow? Will we be debating if taxpayers should pay for new sneakers for all students that are interested in running to keep fit? In my monologue, I posited that it is not our business whatsoever to know what is going on in anyone's bedroom nor do I think it is a topic that should reach a Presidential level. / My choice of words was not the best, and in the attempt to be humorous, I created a national stir. I sincerely apologize to Ms. Fluke for the insulting word choices."

Fluke did not seem very impressed with Limbaugh's state of contrition. In the famliar coddling confines of ABC's The View, Fluke stated

"I don't think that a statement like this, saying that his choice of words was not the best, changes anything, and especially when that statement is issued when he's under significant pressure from his sponsors who have begun to pull their support from the show. I think any woman who has ever been called these types of names is [shocked] at first. But then I tried to see this for what it is, and I believe that what it is, is an attempt to silence me, to silence the millions of women and the men who support them who have been speaking out about this issue and conveying that contraception is an important healthcare need that they need to have met in an affordable, accessible way."

After a tough week, Sandra Fluke is reportedly hiring a public relations firm to handle the deluge of requests from the media for appearances. Fluke, who has participated in pro-choice organizations as well as domestic voilence prevention since Cornell has referred to such work as her 'career path.'

Can you imagine if you're her parents how proud of Sandra Fluke you would be? Your daughter goes up to a congressional hearing conducted by the Botox-filled Nancy Pelosi and testifies she's having so much sex she can't afford her own birth control pills and she agrees that Obama should provide them, or the Pope.