JFK Assassination

JFK was a evil freak.


Just The Facts

  1. JFK was evil
  2. JFK killed Marylin
  3. Joe Dimaggio kicked JFK's ass with a magic bullet.

Back and to the Left. Back and to the Left...

JFK was a good man - fuck that lie. He was an Adolf Hitler level genocider- JFK ended 109 nations of Native Victims of America in the sixties, declared them extinct, stole their land - left them to rot in the deserts of California. ICH BEIN EIN BERLINER indeed.

Don't be fooled by the myth that he saved the world during the Cuban Missile Crises. He was one of the two evil bastards with his hand on the button. He almost ended the world, sorry - doesn't make him our savior that he changed his mind.

But it was his directing of the CIA to do political murders for him that came back to bite him in his brain in Dallas they say. We're not referring to his obsession with ending Pretty Beard Fidel Castro - we're talking about the presidential murder of his chubby mistress Marylin Monroe.

This is the rumor, and we won't to bug you with evidence that Lee Harvey Oswald's magic bullet didn't split Kennedy's ugly melon. If you want the details that prove conspiracy, or to choose from the cluster fuck of theories on who did it from which snipers nest and which secret society or intelligence agency set the whole game up, then go to the LIEbrary. You are all smart, you know the official story is a big damn lie, always is. Let us present to you a story that is the truth. Maybe. All we can promise is that we did not make this up. It is a real theory.

According to CIA trained, now retired, white house sex slave Cathy Obrien, Marylin
Monroe was the first of her kind - the first Presidential model, mind controlled sex machine. JFK and his brother RFK liked to make the white bread sex sandwich, using Marilyn Monroe as meat. Mind controlled or not, here our story begins.*

Now, CIA trained sex slaves like Marylin Monroe, their brains are destroyed by their programmers. In their thirties, their psyches shatter, they go nuts, out of control, and so they get murdered by their handlers. So the rumor goes - Monroe started making threats, stuff like, "JFK if you don't leave your wife and marry me like you promised, I am going to ruin your marriage by writing a book about us screwing and about all the super secrets you told me in bed, like about space aliens," on and on, that kind of thing. So JFK, he sends his brother to do the job right. So Bobby shows up for his date with Monroe on the afternoon of her death, and he directs her murder. He smokes a cigarette and jacks off while Monroe's personal doctor is forced at gunpoint by the secret service to administer a poison enema to poor Marilyn's beautiful colon. And she died with a smile on her face and with Bobby Kennedy's DNA all over her ass cheeks.

A few months later, the same dudes who do murder for the president, they get orders from the shadows of men who are even more powerful and deadly than JFK, and they turn on him. So the secret service or whoever, they use Joe Dimaggio. They take Dimaggio and they show him film of his wife Marilyn Monroe giving head to JFK.* They show him briefcases full of photographs of the death of Marilyn Monroe, they show him a snuff film made by the FBI of JFK's brother smoking and jacking off to the death rattle of Marilyn, of proof absolute that JFK ordered the Marilyn Monroe hit. They give Joe a pistol with a magic bullet, and they give him a sniper's nest underneath Dealey Plaza and they give him an underground egress route.

Joe Dimaggio was in Dallas on Novemeber 22, 1963. Where exactly? Underneath Dealey Plaza, curled up in a storm drain on Houston street with a pistol in one hand and a hard on for murder in the other. So he split JFK's wig open like a watermelon with a magic brand bullet, blew JFK away, had every right to. JFK had ordered the murder of the most beautiful woman in the world. At least - the most beautiful woman in the world to Smoking Joe. And Joe and his smoking gun walked the underground storm tunnel for a mile until it poured outside into the Trinity River - and he got away with it. And the Secret Service set the whole game up, but Smoking Joe in his later years, felt used by his government, and Smoking Joe died officially of lung cancer, and he died a very angry and bitter old drunk. It is presumed that Smoking Joe, like the ghost of JFK, went straight to Hell, because that is where killers go, where they fight over that woman still, and forever.

*On April 14, 2008 the New York Post did a story. A rich New Yorker purchased the hardcore sex tape of Monroe giving JFK fellatio in the White House from the son of an FBI informant for 1.5 million dollars. According to FBI files that confirm the tape's existence, Joe Dimaggio tried to purchase the original sex tape from the FBI to bury it for 25 thousand dollars back in the day.