Perfume

Perfume is basically alcohol with flower petals thrown in. Oh, and it costs ten million dollars.

There's only three options

Just The Facts

  1. Perfume is an insanely popular cosmetic product, with dozens of new fragrances coming out every day.
  2. Perfumes are basically bottled alcohol mixed with scented oil.
  3. These scents cost hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars.

Perfume: The Beginning

The art of creating perfumes started in ancient Egypt and Mesopotamia, and eventually was modified and refined by the Romans. Tapputi is actually the first known fragrance chemist, crafting perfumes from oils, flowers and other items to create her scents.

Tapputi wasn't known for her perfume containers

Europe had been making perfumes since 1221, with France and Italy kicking everyone else's butt; both countries were-and still are-perfume centers of the world. But before you begrudge them this honor, keep in mind that the main purpose of crafting perfume was to give the wealthy a way to cover up horrible B.O. that resulted from their extremely infrequent baths and showers.

Perfume is probably not going to make much of a difference here.

Describing a Perfume

Apparently describing how a perfume smells is a highly sensitive art, one where the "perfume connoisseurs" have about the same level of douchebaggery as wine snobs. The science of describing a fragrance is complex, requiring charts and graphs to fully explain the "fragrance notes" and "olfactive families."

This is apparently a fragrance pyramid. Not a geometry problem.

So next time your girlfriend asks you what you think about her new perfume, don't just stand there with a blank look on your face! Use this chart:

Nohting turns you on like hints of "Woody Oriental."

Celebrity Perfumes

Celebrity perfumes are a recent trend, and an extremely lucrative one at that. Perfumes endorsed or created by celebrities can make millions of dollars, and while some are worthy fragrances, others...

Never has the word "Lovely" been less apt to describe a picture.

Celebrity Perfumes are a million dollar business, plus it's easy to start thanks to the built in fanbase. Still, some fragrances....

Why

do

these

exist?

Answer: Because people buy them. Way to support those poor celebrities, America!