Churros. You know and love 'em. But are they more than just delicious? Yes they are!

Just look at that phallic imagery.

Not to be confused with this.

Just The Facts

  1. The churro was in fact invented in Spain, not Mexico.
  2. No seriously, TV has lied to you about that.
  3. Often eaten topped with chocolate or filled with chocolate. Except in America.
  4. Named after a breed of sheep called a Churro. See above.
  5. For some reason, spell check does not think "churro" is a real word.
  6. Attracts boobs.

Cracked on Churros

Churros were invented in Spain, its origins are unknown to most. However they were most likely made by men who thought that fried dough shaped like a stick rolled in sugar was a good idea. Which actually turned out to be true for once. They're easy to eat, cheap, (except in Disneyland) and all around a delicious. Universally loved for the whole world for the most part, even by Walt Disney.

But... Should I eat it?

Oh, yes you should. And you know it. It's something that's deep-fried with CHOCOLATE on it. It's like chocolate covered bacon. Just with less Bacon... Just look at it.

And how it imitates a waffle. How adorable.

When you taste the first bite, you experience eternal happiness. Okay, maybe not eternal. But you know what I mean. But when you take a bite of your 10th or maybe 11th, you experience nausea. And if you're sitting out there, thinking "Hey, I love churros! I never experience nausea!" Then you're betraying yourself. And you know it. And if you don't admit it, then you are double-betraying yourself, by thinking, that you're not. You're mom and I (and that freak) are very disappointed in you.

But what about the chicks?

Girls love 'em too.


See what I mean? So, if you're on a date (wich I assume, you will never be), make sure to stop by the churros-seller and get some to share. And if you're not on a date, get something anyway. Girls can feel the power of the churro... If you're lucky, you might even get the chance to buy your way in to the sweet girl who are serving you. (And by "buy" I don't mean she's a hooker... Oh, wait. Yes I do.)

So get going with those churros out there!