Yugioh Gx

***SPOILERS*** Jaden turns evil at the end. ***END SPOILERS***

Just The Facts

  1. Duel Academy is a high school for children's card games.
  2. The ratio of males to females at Duel Academy is about 500 to 1. However, most of the males look like women. As a result, Yugioh GX is popular with yaoi fangirls.
  3. Yes, it's ridiculous, but it could be worse. At least they don't play card games on motorc- oh, wait, they already made another Yugioh spinoff where they do that. I wish I was making this up.

The Plot

After Yugioh ended, Seto Kaiba founded Duel Academy, a high school for children's card games. Let that sink in for a moment. A card game only played by little kids and people with Asperger's syndrome got so popular that they had to make a high school for it. Retarded? Yes. But then again, it's anime.

On his way to the entrance exams, insufferable retard Jaden Yuki runs into Yugi, who gives him a card called Winged Kuriboh. The picture on the card then winks at Jaden. He freaks out, thinking he should probably lay off the drugs, but takes the exam anyway. He gets into the school's lowest dorm and goes on adventures with a bunch of people just as annoying as him.

Season 1: Jaden plays a bunch of children's card games to prove his self-worth and save the school from the occasional certain doom it encounters.

Season 2: Same as Season 1, only with a nonsensical plot about a white dorm thrown in.

Season 3: A group of new transfer students come to Duel Academy. Jaden gets really gay with one of them.

Season 4: This season was never dubbed, as it is too retarded even for 4kids. A hermaphrodite posesses Jaden and his gay boyfriend, and he becomes an evil version of himself called Supreme King. In the final episode, Jaden duels Yugi, but the duel has no conclusion and leaves the viewer with a serious case of mindfuck.

Life at Duel Academy

The Academy is located on an island inaccessible to the rest of the world, to make sure the eyeliner-wearing man-ladies who go there get as gay with each other as possible. The island is also home to an active volcano, because Seto Kaiba thought this was a good idea.

Students at the Academy are divided into dorms based on their skill at a children's card game. Which dorm they are in determines their entire identity and self-worth because life's just a bitch like that. In order from best to worst, the dorms are: Obelisk Blue (stuck-up assholes), Ra Yellow (people with no actual impact on the plot), and Slifer Red (people who are too stupid to play a children's card game). Jaden, being the retard he is, is actually proud of his status as a Slifer "slacker" because it means he doesn't have to do as much to impress people. So, yeah, he's just as much of a douche as those Obelisks.

The Characters

  • Jaden Yuki: GX's main character. Unfortunately for viewers, he's annoying as fuck and has the approximate intelligence of a steaming donkey shit. He eats truckloads of food but manages to stay rail-thin and his hair looks like a Kuriboh. His catchphrase is "get your game on" and when he says it, you want to kill yourself.
  • Syrus Truesdale: Jaden's roommate and best friend. Although he looks about five years old, he's in high school. Syrus spends most of his time whining and has a Dark Magician Girl fetish.
  • Chazz Princeton: The biggest douchebag ever, real or fictional. Like Seto Kaiba, Chazz is a rich bastard who spends all his money on card games and being a dick. Unlike Seto Kaiba, Chazz has no redeeming qualities. At the beginning of the series he is an Obelisk, but the school hates him so much that they move him to Slifer. He is in love with Alexis, who hates him for understandable reasons.
  • Alexis Rhodes: The only girl who is actually relevant to anything. Alexis has no personality whatsoever and is a total bitch, but her tits are really big, so people like her anyway.
  • Bastion Misawa: A British guy who's good at math. This is as developed as his character gets.
  • Zane Truesdale: Syrus' older brother who looks nothing like him. At the beginning of the series, Zane is Duel Academy's top-ranked student and an emo kid with a superiority complex. After graduating, he turns into Hell Kaiser, a duelist executioner and bondage whore who electrocutes himself, and at one point his little brother, for sexual thrills. ***SPOILERS: ZANE DIES***
  • Blair Flannigan: A girl who loves Jaden for reasons unknown to man.
  • Atticus Rhodes: At one point, we meet the dark, brooding badass duelist known as Nightshroud. In a plot twist that would make M. Night Shayamylan wet himself, Nightshroud is revealed to be Alexis' missing older brother! Atticus then reverts to his old self, somehow Nightshroud's polar opposite, and becomes a regular character. He really, really wants to be a rock star, but really, really sucks at singing. He plays the guitar too, and surfs while showing off his tight, tight ass for the fangirls. He also has a huge gay crush on Zane. Alexis and Atticus are the first pair of siblings in Yugioh to resemble each other in any way.
  • ASS-TER PHOENIX Another rich douche. Aster wears suits all the time for no reason and never shuts up about this "destiny" bullshit. Also, the name: Aster Phoenix. It actually manages to be even more ridiculous than Chazz Princeton.
  • A fat guy
  • A guy who likes dinosaurs
  • A guy with a pet crocodile
  • Jesse Anderson: A transfer student who shows up once the series is already half-over, and a flaming homosexual. Jesse speaks in an obviously fake Southern accent and loves rainbows, crystals, and wearing frills. Jaden and Jesse's gay love is beyond subtext, to the point where it's glaringly obvious; they're like Axel and Roxas, only in a shitty anime instead of a shitty game. This makes Yugioh GX a magnet for insane yaoi fangirls.
  • Various teachers, including more fatties, a few evil guys, a blatant Asian stereotype, and a man who looks like a bad drag queen and will haunt your nightmares forever.