Possums

The possum is a small, almost demonic creature that feeds on the souls of babies and the elderly for nutrition. BUT THEY ARE ADORABLE!

A Pest? How can something with that face be dangorus?

Oh. Thats how.

Just The Facts

  1. Possum is the name for about 69 different species of small rat like animals
  2. They are quadrupedal diprotodont marsupials. (Those may or may not be real words)
  3. There Latin name is Trichosurus vulepcula.

Interaction with Humans

The possum is from Australia, but is also found in other horrible places such as New Guinea, Sulawesi and China.

The possum has been a part of Australian folklore since the small, very pale people ruled. The Aboriginal Australians once used possum hides while playing the game of Marn Grook. (Even after extensive research I was not able to find what the hell Marn Grook was, so we must assume they used the possum hides for horrible, horrible things.)

Possums are found in suburban areas where they are considered a pest because they eat fruit, vegetables, flowers and tender young babies right out of the womb.

The possum also has a very distinct territorial call that annoys all the neighbors, and has more then once led to a large group of angry Australians to hunt them down, and eat them. Sadly the possum, or as society calls them, giant rats, are protected by the bleeding heart of Australia's government. People are not even allowed to engage them. Threat means if a possum makes a nest in your wives vagina, sex is about to get a lot more painful for the both of you, because they don't like being pocked

The Possum in New Zealand

Unlike Australia, New Zealand does not like the possum, and wants them dead. The possum population, (and yes, there is a actual population of possums), has grown so large that they are becoming a nuisance, witch is worse then a pest, but not as bad as living in New Zealand.

Since there are no predators to the possum in New Zealand, the government has taken it upon itself to attempt to wipe the furry bastards off the face of the earth. In fact they even sell clothes that are made with 95% possum fur.

They had some success. In 1996, the announced that the possum population has dropped from 70 million to 30 million. There are more possums still there then people. I am thinking a revolution will start soon.