Skiing

Skiing is one of the best sports on the planet, as long as you do it properly, and the right kind.

How to ski....

....and how not to ski.

Another good reason for skiing being the best sport on the planet.

Just The Facts

  1. Good skiers have been know to use their skill on the mountain to seduce up to four chalet girls at once.
  2. Bad skiers make fools of themselves falling over on almost flat ground and skiing into trees.
  3. Any type of skiing that requires the skier to put on a tight fitting lycra/spandex suit is an affront to life.
  4. Skiing is superior to snowboarding because without skiing, boarding would never have existed.

The best of skiing

The best kinds of skiing require the skier to have balls made of granite, and these include freestyle (flying 90 feet through the air doing various tricks with only two thin planks of wood on your feet for you to land on), and speed skiing (going so fast down a hill that if you fall the friction will melt your suit and burn you.... thats right, you are going so fast that fucking SNOW will burn you)

And the worst of skiing

People who ski recreationally are know as punters and are hated by all serious skiers because they clog up slopes and fall over lots. However they do sometimes cause hilarity by skiing into trees, falling off chair lifts etc.

The only kind of skier worst than the punter is the racer. These idiots feel the need to wear body hugging lycra and are an affront to life itself.