Kniting. Grandma knitting in a rocking chair. Susan knitting socks for her unborn child. This girl knitting lingerie for tonight, when you will have se--WHAT, that's not what you think of when you think about knitting? Well, that's a shame.

Yeah! Go knit your bit....

...with her... this knitting club.

Just The Facts

  1. The Urban Dictionary definition for knitting is, "Getting shagged! Getting laid..."
  2. Normal knitting needles are allowed on planes but circulars aren't, because they're afraid you'll strangle someone. You terrorist, you.
  3. After a little practice, you can knit without looking. TV time!

If you want to knit....

We are going to assume that now you want to learn how to knit. Because you do.

First, get your ass to a craft store. Buy some needles. ( I reccomend size eight, bamboo ones.) Now buy yourself some nice yarn. Now get someone to teach you how to knit, so you can make yourself condoms or whatever.

You know who used to knit? FDR. Brad Pitt still does. Julia Roberts knits, too.