John Travolta

John Travolta is an American actor, singer, and dancer who is known for playing Danny Zuko in Grease, flying airplanes, and not coming out of the closet.

John, back in his greaser days.

Nom nom nom!

Just The Facts

  1. John is from New Jersey, which brings down his cool factor considerably.
  2. He practices Scientology which brings down his cool factor even more.
  3. He played a woman in Hairspray which brought down his cool factor even more after that.

Speculated Homosexuality

For years there have been rumors surrounding John's sexuality. He denies it, but really, where do you get off? There are pictures of him kissing men. He claims it's just how he greets and says goodbye to friends, but still!!

Here's a picture of John kissing his family's male nanny in 2006.

Oh, nope, we're just friends!

Then at the Santa Barbara International Film Festival John kissed a very startled Kirk Douglas. Douglas had held out his hand for a manly handshake and was in for a rather rude surprise when his buddy John went for the kiss instead. This was just about a year later after his first encounter.


So after these two incidents, John wondered, "how can I make the world believe that I'm not gay!?!" And he came to the conclusion to play a woman in his upcoming musical, Hairspray.

Well doesn't he look pretty!

Being a Pilot

Alongside with John's buzzing career as an actor, he is also a licensed pilot. He is really fond of airplanes, so much that he has 5 of his own, including a goddamn Boeing 707. Also, he pretends that he cares about the enviornment and global warming and shit like that, but then he goes and flies his planes that give off tons of carbon emissions in the meantime. But I'm not here to bash on John for flying his airplanes because if I was rich, I'd sure as hell fly airplanes all over the fucking world too.

Meet me in the cockpit.

Anyways, so a few years ago John got his pilot's license and flies around in his planes. He even has garages at his house for them, if you could call them that..

Great job protecting the 707.