The 5 Silliest Alternate Superhero Costumes

Everyone knows what I'm talking about. Every hero changes their tights at some point. I'm just here to point out the ones that shouldn't have changed. Disclaimer: I realize these are all marvel characters, I apologize if the title mislead you.

yep.

#5: Thanos' Jammies.

Thanos is awesome. He's a villain from the Marvel universe that one day decided he was going to win the love of Death herself. How? Using his awesome titan powers to kill EVERYONE IN THE UNIVERSE. After he attempted this and failed in "Infinity Gauntlet," the big T wasn't as big for a long time.

That is, until huge space event thing "Annihilation" in 2006. In that, Thanos reappeared as an ally to the main bad guy. His warrior garb, hopefully updated to be more intimidating, and to depict the evil of a titan gone mad?

This:

Truly what looks like the strolling clothes of an ancient Greek says "I'll destroy you all."

Yes, that's just a toy, but that's what he dresses like!

Let's compare that to his original costume:

Now THAT says galactic destroyer! Clearly "Annihilation"'s editor thought the same, because Thanos dies in that series. Oh well, all we can hope is that if there's ever a animated or live action representation of Thanos, the designers will choose the original costume.

#4: Magneto's good clothes

Magneto is EASILY one of the most recognizable supervillains out there:

fear magnetism mofo!

The helmet, the cape, the magnetic energy, would anyone want this costume to change?

Well, someone did. In the late 70's, Professor X seemingly died and left Magneto in charge of the X-Men. Why? Well, because ol' Mags got a bonk on the head and turned a new leaf (seriously). Magneto, as the new leader of the X-Men, chose this costume:

Magneto why?! Why the no helmet? Why no more red? Why the huge freakin' M on your chest? I don't know. All I know is, thankfully Magneto's goodness didn't last long and he went back to the classic costume fast.

#3: Cosmic Spider-Man

There's this thing that is constantly trying to find a host in Marvel comics. This thing is the Cosmic Force. The Cosmic Force has gone to Captain America, dozens of space heroes nobody cares about, and usually the host becomes "Captain Universe." Enter Spider-Man, the most popular character in the history of Marvel. Apparently some fan sent a letter to the Marvel offices complaining that Spidey was too weak or something, and the editorial department flipped out.

It was decided that Spider-Man should meet the Cosmic Force and become the most disco hero ever:

get down y'all

Cosmic Spider-Man. Note the copious amounts of silver with the tiny piece of Spider-Man sticking out at the top. This doesn't say "more powerful Spidey," this says "a 2nd grader colored the wrong colors Spidey." I mean geez, what were they thinking?

#2: Nomad

At some point in time, Captain America decided that he needed a break from being one of the most respected and beloved superheroes of all time, and that he wanted to try a new identity.

This identity was Nomad:

Nomad basically amounted to being the exact same thing as Captain America just without the shield. Also, note the look on the villain's face. Even the guy with a tire mark for a nose thinks Nomad looks silly. How does this speak "Nomad" anyway? It looks like a wrestler from the 40's ripped some dinner plates and yellow drapes out of his house and went to beat people up. For some reason, Marvel executives loved this persona. 30 years after Nomad retired, there's a new, modern one. God help us all.

#1: Corporal Punishment

In the end of the massive Marvel event "Civil War," Captain America surrenders to Iron Man by removing and dropping his mask to the ground. Shortly after, The Punisher walks out of nowhere and picks it up. On the back cover of the final Civil War issue, there's a spread asking several questions, including "what will Punisher do with Cap's mask?" I have to admit, I was curious. When the Punisher finally resurfaced, it was as Corporal Punishment:

wonderful

Wow. Just wow. Not only is the name stupid, just look at that outfit! I guess Punisher decided the best way to honor Captain America was to create an outfit that looks like Nick Fury's, only with the Nomad's bellbottoms and guns that would make a Gundam blush. Thankfully, because of huge fan backlash, the Punisher dropped the duds very quickly, but the image of Corporal Punishment remained in the minds of comic geeks long after that.