Comedy Central Vs. Terrorism

Will Comedy Central finally find their backbone?

Just The Facts

  1. South Park first premiered on Comedy Central in 1997.
  2. A lot has changed since 1997.
  3. Apparently we can't depict the Prophet Muhammed...or can we?

Why Can't We Be Friends?

There comes a point in our lives when we must take a stand for what is truly worth protecting. Whether it's loved ones, a home, or maybe the freedom of speech, there are a number of things that we must guard against the a**holes of the world. Recently South Park, an Emmy-award winning show, reached its 200th and 201st episode, which is something to be proud of. As a South Park fan, I liked the 200th episode and episode 201 would've been a perfect episode if Comedy Central didn't wimp out once again.

Wait, what happened this time?

Synopsis of the 200th and 201st episode: all the celebrities South Park has ever made fun of create a giant law suit against the town, with Tom Cruise leading the charge.

That doesn't sound so bad.

Synopsis (cont'd): The celebrities will drop the charge unless the citizens of South Park bring them the prophet Muhammad.

Oooooooh.

Now in episode 200, South Park was able to get away with mentioning Muhammad and even giving him a voice. However, once some radical Muslims got wind of this, they promptly sent Comedy Central a nice little death threat should they air Muhammad on cable television; Comedy Central, having a medical history of vaginanitis, promptly responded to the death threat by censoring episode 201.

So they censored Muhammad again?

Muhammad was actually censored purposely by South Park. What Comedy Central DID censor was the actual word Muhammad, so anyone who spoke his name would be bleeped. That was annoying, but not as irritating as bleeping out South Park's usual moral message at the end of the episode.

Why would they bleep out the moral message?

Because Comedy Central is full of pussies who submit to bullies and thugs.

That's an immature answer. I'm pretty sure Comedy Central was more concerned with protecting its staff and innocent bystanders.

BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA...hah hah...hah, oh wait you were being serious?

>: (

Listen, I would be more sympathetic if Trey Parker and Matt Stone made the actual call. If they received a death threat and said to each other, "Oh man, we should take this seriously," and made the decision based on the need to protect their staff, friends, and family then yes that would make sense. However this is Trey Parker and Matt Stone we're talking about, and I'm fairly certain they have bigger balls than the TV executives over in Comedy Central. Unlike the South Park staff, TV executives are more interested in things like money and their pathetic lives; so it's in their best interest to not get fired and stay alive as long as possible. Also, I call shenanigans when Comedy Central decided to bleep out the moral message; the message wasn't so much about being able to portray Muhammad any way you want, but to not give in to intimidation and fear:

"In the 14 years we've been doing South Park we have never done a show that we couldn't stand behind. We delivered our version of the show to Comedy Central and they made a determination to alter the episode. It wasn't some meta-joke on our part. Comedy Central added the bleeps. In fact, Kyle's customary final speech was about intimidation and fear. It didn't mention Muhammad at all but it got bleeped too" (Parker and Stone).

Unmistakably, Parker and Stone were not afraid of silly death threats by some radical group located in New York because they knew better. Comedy Central executives, living in some kind of paranoia, decided not to take any risks.

Well, I mean, you can't really blame them. Depicting Muhammad is a touchy subject and--

--what was that?

Hm, oh that? Oh that's Muhammad illustrated in a South Park episode.

You mean--

Yup! South Park has shown Muhammad on live cable television before and nobody cared back then.

Why do we care now?

Well some a**holes decided to ruin everybody's fun by driving jet airplanes into buildings. Not to mention a cartoonist who caused some jackasses to riot over a Muhammad cartoon, and the murder of a Dutch film-maker Theo Van Gogh: Van Gogh made a film about the treatment of women in the Islamic world.

Sounds grim, maybe it was a good thing Comedy Central bleeped out the episode.

...I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that.

You're just saying that because you're not taking this seriously.

I'm well aware of what terrorists and radicals are capable of. The world witnessed back in the early 2000's terrorist attacks on New York City, Madrid, and London. However I'm also well aware of what the rest of the world is capable of, predominantly the United States of America. Now let's just say this threat was real and the radical group wanted to exact its "justice" on South Park and Comedy Central. This radical group would probably get organized and try to blow up Comedy Central studios or attempt to murder the South Park staff, so good luck getting past security--but suppose the radical group did succeed by blowing up something or (God forbid) murdering Matt Stone and Trey Parker. USA would implode and obliterate those responsible for the casualties. If you don't believe me then ask yourselves, how did the USA react to 9/11? Did they--

a) Try to hold a peace conference with the terrorists.

b) Sent a fruit basket with a card reading, "Sorry you guys have anger management problems. Can we still be friends?"

c) Said, "I hope you like the crap being bombed out of you, because that's the forecast for the next decade!"

Thanks to terrorist activities and radical fundamentalists, theses a**holes opened the floodgates of American patriotism and made everyone's time in Afghanistan, Iraq, and every airport security checkpoint in America a hellish time.

Still there's got to be a better way of working things out.

Yeah, it's called Can't-You-Take-A-Joke-Muslims?

I think it's racist that you're singling out Muslims.

...are you trying to use the race card on me?

(sigh) Yeaaaaah.

Let's clear the air for a second: is it fair that Muslims are stereotyped as terrorists? No of course not. Is it fair that we can't depict Muhammad in some humorous fashion, but we can definitely bash Jesus, Moses, or any other religious figure?

I'd like to think--

Is it?

Well, I mean, we have to respect--

IS IT?

...No.

Right. You see folks, if we really want to make this world a better place and ease some tension we have to understand each other. Every time some guy in a turban or some girl in a hijab goes through airport security, doesn't mean we should automatically target them as a terrorist. How they dress and how they act is their culture and way of life, and their choice must be respected. More importantly, if someone can make a cartoon depiction of Jesus as shown here, then by golly we should have the opportunity to poke fun at Muhammad too. I'd like to address the radical fundamentalists who are trying to ruin everybody's fun: guys, last time I checked my calendar, this was the 21st century, and not the 13th century. The Crusades are over, the Inquisition is gone, and the Holy Land is (partially) yours. You have to grasp the fact that these are no longer the times when you kill someone because they insulted a religious figure. You have every right to protest, or if you want to you can take a leaf out of Scientology's book and hire a bunch of powerful lawyers; you'll come off as cowardly pricks, but at least you'd gain some revenue.

Consider this when you do strike out against whatever person has insulted Muhammad, not only are you hurting the other party, but you're hurting your own culture and ethnicity. Thanks to you radicals, we jump at the site of a kurti. Every time little Amir goes to kindergarten, no one wants to play games with him because all the other kids are afraid of getting blown up. I mean is that the example you really want to set for your entire culture: make fun of us and we'll blow you to bits?

My final message is this: it's ok to have fun with each other. Catholics, Jews, Hindus, Buddhists, we all make fun of each other. Anyone who says they don't laugh at some religious joke is a liar and in complete denial. Muslims are more than welcome to join in the fun too. As for Comedy Central, I think it's time they man the f**k up and air South Park's episode 201 again, uncensored. It's time we show the bullies and a**holes of the world that we're not afraid. We will not let intimidation hold us back, and we must not be afraid to express what is truly right. Before I finish, I'd like to address the radical fundamentalists one more time: for those of you who want to use violence and fear as a way to repress our comedic humor, I quote the immortal John Stewart who once said, "Go f**k yourselves."