Polar Bear

The Polar Bear: the cutest, cuddliest member of the bear family. Also, the most dangerous member of the bear family. If you see one, please don't approach it. If you approach it, for our convenience, please do not scream too loudly as it kills the sh

That polar bear is not being cute. He is luring you into a false sense of security.

This is why.

Just The Facts

  1. Polar bears are about ten feet tall on average.
  2. Polar bears actually have black skin and transparent fur, which channels the white color of with the snow and ice around them.
  3. Polar bears are classed as "vulnerable"

Polar Bears Are Bloodthirsty Assholes

Polar bears are keen hunters. They are the most carnivorous form of bear, and with a strong sense of smell, giant claws and being fucking polar bears, they could kill just about anything. Now we here at Cracked know that animals, like the polar bear, need to often kill things to survive.

But they don't just kill things. They really kill things. A polar bear's most common prey is a seal. It smells a seal, waits by a hole in the ice till it pops up, drags the seal out of the water, and crushes it's skull between it's teeth. That's just unnecessary, isn't it? Surely there are more merciful and less horrifying ways to kill a seal?But no, the polar bear has to crush it's skull, and pulverise it's brains.

Basically, polar bears are bloodthirsty assholes. Don't tell them we said that.

They Resent Us For Keeping Them In Captivity

As shown below, polar bears will attempt to devour humans at every possible oppurtunity