Halo 3 Skulls

Every male reading this has played Halo 3. Every male worth a damn has found all the skulls in Halo 3. If you find them all, you get to see cortana nude.

This is a skull. What? Were you expecting a X-rated shot of Cortana? Come on

This is what you actually get for collecting all the skulls, sorry fanboys.

Just The Facts

  1. Gold Skulls make the game harder, Silver Skulls make it more fun.
  2. All the Gold Skulls also make the game harder to play, ranging from annoying Tough Luck, to the downright insane Iron and Mythic skulls.
  3. Most people just collect these to get Hayabusa Armor, which while still cool looking, shouldn't be the only reason to collect skulls. USE THEM TO ENHANCE YOUR GAMING EXPERIENCE DAMNIT!!!!

Iron Skull or "Absolutely No Checkpoints, ever"

This is one of my least favorite skulls. It also, without a doubt, earns the most ire whenever i play a level using it. Say for instance, you decide to play "The Covenant" on legendary, a level which, if you don't die(remember this, it's improtant), takes a good 45 minutes to complete. Now say you've just gotten to the part where The Arbiter kills The Prophet of Truth(SPOILER ALERT!!! sorry for any girl or person from 2007 reading this) which is about 30 minutes in. You've killed a ton of Brutes, at least three Wraith Tanks, three or four Ghosts, two Choppers, three standing turrets, and two Hunters (not to mention enough Grunts and Jackals to fill an olympi swimming pool with their blood alone) and had to get in three or four vehicles and avoid being exploded just to get to this point. Then, someone sticks you with a grenade and you die. Usually, this is a minor, irritating setback. However, if you have the Iron Skull on, you have to start the level over completely, and DO ALL THOSE THINGS AGAIN! If you're like me, a suave billionaire who double teams supermodels witht he ghost of Teddy Roosevelt and plays Halo 3 when he's bored, this causes you to pull your hair out and scream, "REALLY? ONE GREANDE DESTROYS ALL MY PAST ACCOMPLISHMENTS?" This is like having to redo your term paper because you had a typo or a grammar error, completely fucking rediculous. The only good thing about playing with skull is you get really good at not dying after a while. That being said, do not use this skull unless you have incredible patience or are a ninja.

Black Eye or "Catharsis"

This skull isn't so much annoying as it is cumbersome. This makes it so that your sheilds will not rechrage until you melee attack an enemy. Now i'm all for plasma-pistol-whipping a Grunt so hard their face mask falls off but when i'm fighting a literal Shitton (or two metric assloads for you europeans out there) of enemies and coming under constant fire, i have little opportunity to go out of my way to smack-a-bitch, no matter how much i want to. This skull, as many other skulls, causes a lot more dying on your part than anything else.

Tough Luck or "Dodgeball"

This skulls makes all the enemies really good at dodging things. Grenades, Needler Rounds, Fuel Rod Gun Shots, shoes thrown at them during press conferences, you name it, they dodge it. Remember how satisfying it felt to lob a plasma grenade into a phalanx of Grunts and watch them go flying because they were too stupid to know what a shiny ball of death looks like? Well now, they will all dive away from anything resembling a grenade, rendering explosives pretty much useless unless you stick them. This isn't a bad skull to use, it makes the game legitimately more challenging without ging so far as to make it aggravating.

Catch or "Halo 3 as directed by Michael Bay"

This is also one of the more annoying skulls in the game. It turns your game into a Michael Bay movie, minus the skanky chicks. It increases the number of explosions by about 1000%. Basically, everyone in the game but you gets an unlimited supply of grenades, which they use to solve all their problems. Remember the first part of the Crow's Nest Level, where that Warthog gets blown up by a single plasma grenade? Well now it gets blown up by 20. Then when you go down that corridor to kill all the grunts, they thriw about thirty more at you, EACH! Brutes do this too. one good thing about this skull is that your allies, retards as they are also get unlimited grenades, which they use a lot. However, they aren't too careful about where they aim, so you're just as likely to die by their hands as you are by the Covenant's. Also, when an enemy dies, their grenades are scattered around them, if any grenades go off near this ordinance pile, every grenade goes off, making every room a minefield and toss a risk. Also, every greandes thrown by an enemy goes directly at you, even if they are throwing from across the map. They could throw a grenade from Pluto, and it would travel at a constant speed, maintaining the perfect arc, to land right on top of you, in your exact position, at the bottom of the Mariana Trench on Earth. Because of this, you die, A LOT! You can only imagine how frustrating it is to play with Iron and Catch activated.

Fog or "No Help for You"

There's not much to be said about this skull. It just takes away your radar. This is hardly even noticeable.The only time this skull really aggravates me, is when i think i've killed everybody and a Flood-form comes up and whacks me from behind.

Famine or "Make Your Shots Count"

This skull really makes the game challenging. it makes all your weapons spawn with half as much ammo as they normally would, drastically limiting the number of shots you can fire and making it much harder to kill enemies. Interstingly enough, weapons that come in crates are unaffected by this skull but they are few and far between on some levels. Also, it makes energy swords and gravity hammers have less charge in them, which really pisses me off.

Thunderstorm or "Everyone's A General"

This skull is pretty interesting. It makes every enemy go up in rank. Rank is determined by shiled capacity, difficulty to kill, and armor color. This makes just about every Grunt a red or green Grunt instead of an orange one, every Brute a red or gold Brute instead of blue, and every Jackal have a gold shield. This effectively makes them harder to kill and makes them better shots.

Tilt or "Steroids"

This amplifies enemies' resistances and weaknesses. All covenant armor is strong against bullets but weak against plasma bolts. This means that with this skull activated on legendary mode it will take about 180 shots from an assault rifle to remove a gold Brute's armor, but only one charged plasma pistol shot to do the same amount of damage. It also doubles their health, so it takes twice as much damage to kill them. This allows most enemies to survive a grenade going off right next to them and some Brutes to survive a direct sticking grendade to the head. TO THE HEAD!!!!! this skull makes enemies so broken, it's like fighting an army of Metaknights in Super Smash Bros. Brawl when you are playing as Mewtwo, totally unfair.

Mythic or "Good Luck"

This skull is the mother of all skulls. It adds an extra difficulty level, Mythic, which is harder than Legendary! The only thing harder than beating a game on Mythic, is beating a game with every one of the aforementioned skulls activated on Mythic, and the only thing harder than that is my cock, which can cut through diamonds. Mythic makes every enemy even tougher, have even more health, and ten times as numerous.

Blind or "Look, Ma, No Guns!"

This is the first Silver Skull, it turns your weapons invisible so you cannot see which you are using, where you are aiming or how much ammo you have left. This is just awful, don't use this skull unless you like pretending you're watching a movie from the first person point of view.

Grunt Birthday Party or "YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!"

This is the best skull in the game, period. Every time you shoot a Grunt in the head with a scoped weapon, he explodes, confetti showers down, and little children scream, "Hooray!" in the background. This made me fall over laughing the first time i saw it in action. It provides endless hours of fun for the whole family, just get a battle rifle and a load of Grunts and you have a party! Also, the explosion caused by getting a head shot can set off nearby plasma grenades casuing more explosions!!!

Cowbell or "Fuck You, Einstein"

This Skull amplifies the physics in the game. If a grenade goes off near an enemy and manages not to kill them, they go flying. Melee attacks also cause enemies to go farther than usual. A Grunt will go 20 feet, a Jackal 10, and a Brute 5. Also, it increases the explosion radius of the grenades so that they damage more enemies and have a greater chance of setting off other grenades!

I Would Have Been Your Daddy or "The Most Worthless Skull in the Game"

Ok, i'm going to catch a lot of flack for this, i know, but hear me out. All this skull does is change the dialogue in the game. It IS funny the first few times to hear a Brute say, "You killed my lover" but after that, it gets old. Also, the effort required to get this skull is absurd. You have to jump through a series of giant, holographic hoops to get this skull in a specific order that no one would have thought of on their own. And even if you do that, it doesn't always work. I doubt many people could find this skull without the use of a strategy guide or cheat site. That said, I think you'll agree that the effort required to get this skull is not matched by the rewards it delivers.