Dr. Seuss
Dr. Seuss is primarily known as a children's book author whose name is misspelled more often than it is spelled correctly. He also wrote some of his most successful books as responses to dares.
Just The Facts
- Theodor Seuss Geisel first started using the pen name "Dr. Seuss" to continue writing for the Dartmouth humor magazine after he was suspended from extracurricular activities due to underage drinking.
- Seuss is misspelled as Suess almost more often than it is spelled right.
- Also, everyone pronounces it wrong. It's supposed to rhyme with "voice".
The Cat in the Hat
Dr. Seuss's most famous book is easy for small children to read, and from the outside, appears to be easy for small children to write. In fact, the Cat in the Hat was more meticulously planned than most NASA missions.

The Cat in the Hat is a classic that has endured the test of time, Mike Myers' cinematic atrocity, and hipsters wearing the cat's hat in an attempt to be ironic.
It started with a 1955 article by William Spaulding of Houghton Mifflin, called "Why Johnny Can't Read". Instead of taking the easy route ("Because Johnny is stupid.") Spaulding analyzed the state of reading material for young children and found it insufferably boring and retarded. Not only did nobody care about Dick and Jane throwing a ball, least of all small children with short attention spans, but the choice of words was haphazard - throwing in anything with one or two syllables instead of deliberately coming up with the most useful words to help kids learn.
Spaulding hooked up with Seuss and challenged him with the novel idea of writing a book with an actual story kids would want to read. If that wasn't crazy enough, he asked him to use a list of 300 words that they had come up with, targeted toward helping kids practice phonics.
Seuss thought this was insane and was attempting to politely back out of it when he glanced at the list one more time and decided he'd make a title out of the first two rhyming words he saw. They were "cat" and "hat".
Nine months of frustrating work later, he had a book that was 1702 words long with only 220 unique words, telling an interesting story, introducing an unforgettable character, and completely written in anapestic dimeter. (SOURCE)
Green Eggs and Ham
Dr. Seuss's publisher, curious to see how far he could push the poor author, decided to bet $50 he couldn't write a book using only 50 unique words. Sure, he could probably turn out a simple, elegant bedtime reading poem like Goodnight Moon or something, but there was no way he was going to be able to write a story with multiple characters, a central conflict, events leading up to a climax, and a clearly stated but not overly preachy moral.

They do look slightly more tempting in a house, with a mouse...
As you probably know, he then wrote Green Eggs and Ham, which covers all those things (see graphic above). The publisher did not pull another dare on him after that, possibly frightened by the crazed look in Seuss's eyes when he began to bring it up.
As a member of the human race, Dr. Seuss had opinions, and some of these made their way into his books. He never wrote a book with the purpose of telling a moral because kids hated preachiness and so did he. However, he felt that any good story tended to naturally develop a moral, and that explains books like The Lorax (about environmentalism), The Butter Battle War (about the arms race), How The Grinch Stole Christmas (about the true meaning of Christmas), and Green Eggs And Ham (about how it's okay to eat food past its expiration date).

An illustration from The Butter Battle War. The catapult clearly represents ICBMs, or possibly nuclear aircraft carriers.
Like most humans, sometimes Dr. Seuss had bad opinions. During World War II, for example, he hated the Japanese and was in favor of internment camps. His general attitude toward the "Japs" - those abroad and living in America alike - is reflected here:
"But right now, when the Japs are planting their hatchets in our skulls, it seems like a hell of a time for us to smile and warble: `Brothers!' It is a rather flabby battle cry. If we want to win, we've got to kill Japs, whether it depresses John Haynes Holmes or not. We can get palsy-walsy afterward with those that are left."
Before you burn your copy of The Cat in the Hat though, there's more to the story. After the war, he visited Japan and became very concerned about whether Americans were paying enough attention to the war-ravaged country and its rebuilding needs. From these concerns, he wrote Horton Hears a Who, about paying attention to the needs of all people, "no matter how small" (or efficient). He dedicated the book to a Japanese friend.

Horton the elephant clearly represents the Republican administration of President Dwight Eisenhower, which was in charge when the book was written. The previous Horton book, Horton Hatches The Egg, was of course about the time when Eisenhower hatched an egg.






Ha. I love it when good, fun, classic books come out of a bet.
ReplyJapanese is asterisked, really?
Replythat was fascinating.
ReplySeriously, why was that guy squeezing all that sperm?
Reply Hide All See All 5 Replieshave you seen unsqueezed sperm? it's disgusting, man. gotta squeeze it.
If I remember correctly, the spermaceti (whale oil not cooked from blubber, but from inside a sperm whale head and considered far superior) is in grape like structures. So after they scoop the "grapes" out of the whale skull, they have to sit and squeeze them into buckets to get the oil ($) out.
thank you so much for that stunning visual, danisinger...I was perfectly happy believing this was just a semen reference, but no, now I have to picture this the next time I rub one out
Yeah, Moby Dick is quite graphic. I'm not the only Cracked reader who enjoys Mellville, am I?
Yeah, Moby Dick is quite graphic. I'm not the only Cracked reader who enjoys Melville, am I?
*After reading the Moby Dick paragraph.*
ReplyLadies and Gentlemen, Freud just had a heart attack.
"and hipsters wearing the cat's hat in an attempt to be ironic."
Replyi think youve confused ravers with hippsters. but good article all the same
It's The Butter Battle Book, not the Butter Battle War. But awesome page, thanks for putting it together.
ReplyDR. Seuss is my baby daddy mmm i like his rhymes
ReplyUR RONG. The pseudonym 'Dr. Seuss' used to rhyme with 'voice'. Eventually, Mr. Geisel realized most people mispronounce it and changed the pronunciation. So his middle name is still pronounced "soice", but the pseudonym is definitely "soose". I read about it on Wikipedia, so it must be true.
ReplySo it's not just a clever screenname.
I really enjoyed this article. Thank you.
ReplyYou forgot The Sneetches, which teaches children not to follow arbitrary standards of separating the populace into factions. However, if they just bomb the s**t out of you, well...that's something...else.
ReplyI need coffee.
+1
"None upon thar's"
I approve of this message
All this talk of the pronunciation of his name makes me laugh a bit. Germans almost exclusively pronounce their 'S' as 'sh'
Reply Hide All See All 4 RepliesNo, the German 's', by itself, is pronounced like a z. You are thinking of the st sound, which is pronounced like a sht.
At least there is consistancy in German. Please tell me why Cough Rough Bough Tough and Trough are pronounced so differently? And why Minute (time) and Minute (size) are different?
Because English is better that's why
Because you touch yourself at night! lol joking.
Think of the German S as the zz in pizza, it's more of a tsss sound than anything.
Because when stuff started sounding different from old English, and word endings changed, the English, instead of changing the spelling to match the changing ways, decided to be assholes and say, "Fuck it--this'll torment little school boys for years". (They probably didn't spare a thought for little school girls).
I've heard that Green Eggs and Ham is actually a metaphor about bisexual experimentation. 'Struth?
ReplyWhat the fuck?
"Horton Hears His Neighbors Having Sex by Dr. Se(d)uss." -The Critic?
First book I ever read on my own was Green Eggs and Ham when I was 4. But I only learnt how to pronouce his name 16 years later from a REM song...
ReplyOne of the first books I read was "Atlas Shrugged". Eat it foolish peons!
Too bad Ayn Rand is batshit insane. Dr. Seuss is only regular insane.
It's good to know that Seuss was a genuinely good person, even after getting wrapped up in WWII prejudices. Being able to let go of a mindset that you later recognize as flawed is a true show of character.
ReplyI've spent the last 10 minutes using the correct pronunciation of the name, but i'll probably forget it and pronounce it "soos" by this time next week =/
ReplyAgreed. How is it supposed to be pronounced? My parents definitely taught me soos.
Very impressive article - well written, informative, and funny. It's nice to enjoy a good read from the topic pages once in awhile.
Reply Hide All See All 5 Repliesyeah this topics page was about as good as a real article (better than some even)
did not expect this
I agree; this is pretty witty for a Cracked article and almost devoid of low brow humor.
Give it a few days, I'm sure an editor will come by and shoe horn in some pictures of cleavage.
It's a Christina H article, what did you expect?
Really, it's a Christina H article?
Wow. I always thought it was pronounced Dr. Soos
ReplyI learn something new and awesome about Dr. Seuss every time I read an article about him. Also, I never knew Moby Dick was so gay. I'm not even trying to be derogatory, that paragraph was really really gay.
ReplyThe "sperm" referred to in that paragraph of Moby Dick was oil stored in little glands that had to be removed from the whales body then squeezed in order to harvest. In fact that oil was more valuable than the oil derived from the whale blubber(fat).
Great article. I like that you linked a source, too, because that was an interesting read as well.
Reply