Dog Whisperer

Cesar Millan is the star of the popular "Dog Whisperer" TV show that focuses on rehabilitating bad dogs, but mostly just shows how the people are the problem. This is how you can be a Dog Whisperer.

When he's not whispering, he's rear naked choking

Just The Facts

  1. 90% of the issues that people have with controlling their dog are things they do to screw them up.
  2. Cesar Millan is like thousands of other Dog Trainers, and you can use the same methods.
  3. He doesn't actually whisper to them. It doesn't work that way.

Dog Psychology

Dogs can be mindfucked and manipulated to do whatever you want, different breeds of course carry various attributes which can make them susceptible or impervious to certain methods. (I.E. Scent dogs tend to be bad off leash due to the genetic traits that cause them to be good trackers.) Knowing your dog's breed and personality can be a key attribute to training your dog.

Titration level is a way to identify how far you can push your dog before it shuts down or snaps back. (Not the amount of boobies you can have.) Some mutts might have an extremely high titration level, which would cause him to flip you the bird, even if you were strangling him to death. (Not recommended) Some take verbal corrections like you are beating them with a log, this is a low-titration animal and should never be treated like the high ones.

Stay the fuck away from this level

Dogs generally have the intelligence level of a four-year old, give or take a few years, and despite the fact that they have short term memory like an 80 year-old with dementia, they have long term memory. If you pick up a stray, they may have issues which haven't been resolved yet, or you may cause long-lasting harm, that like people, takes a long time to get over.

A long time

Types of behavior changers

Never beat your dog. Do the minimum it requires to teach him what you want, and if you see an adverse reaction, try another method. Like people, every dog is different, and no one method works for every one. Using a combination of the following steps, all or none, can bring you and your dog a lot closer to your goals. Forget what your english teacher taught you, (Sorry, internet.) these terms have their own definitions.

Negative: You are withholding.

Positive: You are giving.

Punishment: This is what you do when something is bad, and you want to stop the dog from doing it.

Reinforcement: This is when you want to reinforce the behavior that you want to see.

Extinction: Ignoring a behavior in order to bring back what either reinforced or punished previously or extinguish something you don't like.

Positive Reinforcement

Positive Reinforcement is the act of giving something in order to encourage the action of the dog. An example of this would be giving the dog a treat every time he stared you in the eyes and shit on your foot. After doing this consistently, your dog will be an eye staring shitting machine every time he wants a treat. In other words, a grandparent.

Great, my foot again.

Usually this is used in order to encourage a natural behavior of the dog into something wanted. If you give him a treat every time he enters his kennel, eventually he will want to live in it, and will genuinely enjoy being there. This works with commands too. Tell him "House" every time he goes in there, followed with a treat, and he will eventually hop in at one command.

Negative Reinforcement

Negative Reinforcement teaches the dog that if he does something bad, you will withhold his rewards, be it verbal praise, a treat, or a handjob.

Who likes a handjob, who!?

Positive Punishment.

There comes a time and a place when a dog needs a little physical reminder that you're the boss. This doesn't imply that you beat him senseless, but it simply associates pain with what you're trying to teach him. Not all dogs are well-equipped to deal with this, and can shut down quite easily, in which case you will not be doing anything productive. Unless you count getting frustrated productive. If you've figured out the level where the dog stops taking your shit, stop there; you can always step it back a little bit, and gauge where his mind is at a later point. Positive Punishment can also be strictly verbal. A loud "No" will suffice for most dogs. It's vital that your voice is different for your corrections than your praise voice. Dogs read tone better than what you actually say.

I told you to get the fuck off the couch, what don't you understand!?

Positive Punishment is just giving a correction, verbal or physical.

Negative Punishment

Withholding punishment is a reward, much like treating your wife nice after she's had a long day in the kitchen. You're withholding the beatings. The same principle applies with the dogs, when you are consistent, they associate lack of a correction with doing something good. Coupled with the Positive Reinforcement, you have a recipe for a well-mannered dog.


Make sure your wife dog always knows how you will respond to situations. If you don't like getting jumped on at the door, refuse to acknowledge them until eventually they may stop jumping. This is the simplest (Not always effective) way to get rid of some behaviors, but if you greet them some days and praise them, they will never know that you don't like it.

Good boy! Now where's the rest of Dr. Manhattan?

Reinforcing works with bad behaviors as well, doggie brains are like sponges and the only way they will determine what's right and wrong is by your reactions to their actions.


In short, the dog is very rarely to blame for the faults that humans find in them, simple solutions and training can make a dog well-balanced, loyal, and obedient. If a problem is out of your control, seek professional help.

It doesn't always need Cesar.