Baywatch

baywatch was an american television shows which ran from 1989 to 1999, its notable stars were david hasselhoff, and pamela anderson,it introduced a whole pre internet porn generation to materials they would have had to use their imagination to create

NOT A REASON BAYWATCH WAS A GOOD SHOW

NBC STUDIOS CIRCA 1989 (YEA THEY JUST HUNG AROUND LIKE THAT)

A GOOD REASON TO WATCH BAYWATCH

Just The Facts

  1. baywatch holds the world record for most viewed tv show in the world of all time, with 1.1 billion views
  2. initially cancelled after the first season for high production costs
  3. sadly david hasselhoff character is the only on to remain on the show for the full 11 seasons
  4. famous for launching the career of the then mostly disease free pamela anderson
  5. co creator greg bonann idea for baywatch came after working as a LA county lifeguard
  6. there is not a single memorable quote available on the web

really?....a show about life guards, thats it?

for years co creator greg bonann worked as a life guard in los angeles, thinking many people hadnt seen life guards in action(mainly relying on the shutin and albino audience), he decided to make a movie about it, when this didnt work  he went to nbc with the tv show idea, which was cancelled after one season,Word got around to david hassellhoff who put his own money into the the resyndicated show(consider it similar to that guy who made bulletball, and steve jobs fgoes batshit and marketed the product , except this had a inkling of potential)

REALITY

BAYWATCH

why was it so sucessful?

for a show about lifeguards ,who in real life are either douchebags that real wear raybans and too much suntan oil, or lesbians who couldnt get into the merchant marines ,baywatch made it cool to be a life guard . This is similar to what chips did for highway cops, so much so that like chips you fogot what a typical lifeguard actually does. instead of swinging whistles and yelling at people swimming past the buoyies, baywatch lifeguards saved at least a dozen people who were or at least pretended to be drowning. many were given a dramatic rescescatation , yet people rarely died.

 what baywatch lacked in intelligent dialougue, interesting, plots, and character developement, it made up with explosions hot makeout action, boobs, and cheesy punchlines  

EVEN BAY DREAMS OF BEING THE HOFF

so what did this create besides michael bays wet dream?, a ratings powerhouse

cracked on baywatch

in the world of tv shows baywatch was like the hot drunk chick always at the party, we all heard of her, we all knew her, yet we dont talk about her , we pretend to listen to what she says, just to get a peak down her shirt,, and when she makes a bad joke we all laugh, and by end we all had a good time and secretly cant wait to see her again

 

NOTE:I WAS USING THIS AS AN ANALOGY BUT THIS CAN LITERALY BE USED TO REFERENCE YASMINE BLEETHE ON A BENDER, WANDERING THE CAL POLY CAMPUS

what we saw on baywatch totals

NUMBER OF PEOPLE WHO DROWNED:LIKE 5.....SERIOUSLY in the whole series run

 

NUMBER OF BOMB THREATS:20

 

 

 

NUMBER OF TERRORIST/PIRATES/SERIAL KILLERS:200

NUMBER OF DROWNING RESCUES:OVER 500

NUMBER OF BOOBS FILMED: EASILY IN THE THOUSANDS

 

characters

david hasselhoff aka matt buchannon

hasselhoffs character is an ex navy seal with years of hand to hand combat experience whos idea of relaxing life is  thwarting pirates, tracking maniac killers, and negoitating hostage situations, on the upside his character matt buchannon is like a father figure to the  guards, unlike his own son who people forgot he even had. but really if u played mentor to a group of ex playboy playmates, or a snot nose kid, the choice is obvious

THE HOFF

pamela anderson aka CJ parker

CJ parker was a new age thinker practicing in dream interpretations, and crystal therapy and if u werent blind you knew she had a huge rack, she was also very interested in  meditation which she did and many men soon followed her idea, because even if u dont believe meditating is thearputic and relaxing you know staring as pam andersons heaving breast was

other ridiculiosly hot lifeguards

yasmeen bleeth aka caroline holden

carmen electra aka lani mckenzi

alenadra paul aka stephanie holden

nicole eggert aka summer quinn

kelly packard aka april giminski

brook burns aka jessie owens

 

 

slow motion/different boob angles keeps baywatch on air

many would surmize that if it was just david hasselhoff and his man boobs slow motion running into the water to save a drowning person  ,there only would have been only  a pilot which would have been burned, or nowadays would be making the bit torrent rounds mislabeled as a megan fox sextape. Instead and thankfully we recieved drool inducing doses of bouncing bosams, jumping juggs, a marathon of mammories, so to speak

 HOW GOOD COULD THE PLOT BE WHEN 10 DIFFERENT CAMERA ANGLES OF THE SAME SCENE SHOT TAKE UP EXEACTLY 5 MINUTES?

LIKE IT REALLY MATTERED

 

 

 

 

 

baywatch hawaii

after 9 seasons in LA, the baywatch set was recast in hawaii minus any of the notable original character, as well there was less action since really hawaii is a vacation spot filled with retirees and geriatrics  who could care less if they drowned, or the island was leveled,.even producer david hasselhoff escaped the hell that was baywatch hawaii after one season, leaving the rest to solve major problems like contaminated spam, and the stolen ukulele

 BAYWATCH HAWAII EXECUTIVE PRODUCER

BAYWATCH HAWAII JUMPS THE SHARK