Customer Service Posters

Ah yes, the fucking customer service poster. The very ones that you have likely seen the prototypical hyper girl staring at longingly as though they were the fucking original Ten Commandments Tablets! These posters obviously give her purpose! But what do they give you? Bullshit, and that is on a good day.

So, dear cashier. It is your first day on the job and you have taken to being a cashier rather well. Of course, you are the only one up at the front so you always get a long ass line. The customers are understandable enough. However, there are five people in line and you need special access (really?) to use the button to just put in the amount of small piece of shit niknaks that are raping your workspace and just scan fucking one of them. Because, keep in mind, this is your first job. This is the most ghetto fabulous place you could find that likes to pretend that it is something more. This is what people of genuine Status call Petite Bourgeois. Of course, in this instance, it is actually grammatically correct.

So when you do call for help (a "code 3"...really) you are scoffed at for not doing your job (by the Front End Supervisor...who is rarely at the Front End) and then you are told to fuck off for the key. Then, as the customers are dealt with and the impulse racks are sorted, you are hounded by a system that you have never heard of and are treated as though it is the driving force in the Universe. This standard is called "5 Star". And suddenly, as though you were once blind before its infernal name was spoken, its posters appear everywhere. And there is nothing you can do to reason with it. Hell, you can't even bring your own pens to the front for fear of your pen somehow destroying the integrity of customer receipts. It may be called something different in other stores but the gist is the same. If you do not do something at the random standards of someone that is in a rush and dicking around everywhere but where you are all day, you are a bad person.

Now, do not assume that the understanding of customers and the time to leave the register and make sure the mess that other people are too busy to clean up is taken care of will always be granted. Customers get agitated and have bad days and sometimes cannot control their emotions. Others are the contents of Lady Hulk's douche. Then there are times when you have ten customers and you cannot make it to other responsibilities whenever someone in charge is walking by and you are scolded for it as though you were a chid. There is no way to win when you are not a valid person. That is why corrupt governments are so successful.

Whether you are just shopping somewhere else, change jobs, or graduated from college, every poster everywhere is called to suspicion. And for good reason, they are all there to manipulate the customers and to bind you to being your most submissive. You know, for shits and giggles. Even when you are educated, some places will expect you to simply assume that you are somehow beneath the people that come to the company for their goods or services. Why? Because they expect the sensationalizing of the bad economy will keep you in line. And if not that then something else. Such as the ethic of professionalism.

There are two kinds of customer service posters and both can and usually will look the same. The styles are different but the messages are usually blurred and murky, like a usual day at work. The message is usually that the people who work at "Institution X"are better at and more willing to serve every need that someone may have. This can either be an attempt to convince you, the worker, or the target consumer. The problem is, if the workers were interested in self-deprication, they would not be working in anything that involved being indoors that did not also factor in their nudity. There is nothing that can stop the "Entitled Generation" from behaving like anyone who uses that term is not making fun of them. So complaining about that is pointless.