The 5 Most Annoying Internet Phrases

The internet has been around since the dawn of awesome, and as a result, spreading imbecilic phrases across the world has never been easier!&&(navigator.userAgent.indexOf('Trident') != -1||navigator.us

Just The Facts

  1. The internet is primarily used for Porn and "various other things" (9/10 times, it's just for porn).
  2. When people aren't using the internet to find nipple shots of their favourite celebrities, there's a good chance they're typing "popular" phrases on a forum.
  3. It's likely they're typing with caps-lock on as well.
  4. LIKE THIS! IN THEIR MIND, IT COMES ACROSS THAT THIS SENTENCE IS BEING YELLED!
  5. They cannot be stopped

The History Of The Internets

Not much is known about the Internets, other than the origin of the word "Internets", helpfully coined by George Dubya Bush. During a speech for the 2000 presidential elections, the 43rd PRESIDENT OF THE USA (This man was in charge, for christs sake!) explained that he had heard "rumours on the internets". Rumours of what? No-ones sure, since everyone stopped listening at that point.

Needless to say, the creation of the internet was a long and tedious one, which you won't really be interested in. Luckily, it has redeemed itself through the use of nudity and odd phrases used by 28 year old men still living in their parents attic or basement. Or possibly shed.

Internet phrases are used, generally, to get a point across using attempted humour, usually contained within just a few words. This means it is much easier for people to finish arguments on forums than in real life.

5. O RLY?

Assuming this can be counted as a phrase, this term dates back to the story of a snow owl looking extremely suprised (from the look on its face, someone started fondling it innapropriately). Legends say, that instead of the owl flying into a rage or fleeing in terror from its molester, it simply turned its head and yelled "OH REALLY?". Of course, once the internet caught hold of this story, hilarity (read: fucking stupidity) ensued.

A clever person managed to obtain an image of a snow owl looking heartily displeased and pasted the words "O RLY?" onto it. Creative? No, but since when has that been a factor in internet popularity?

Of course, this spawned a fanbase, which is why this was made!

Genius, right?

Of course, this phrase has been applied to internet debates, internet arguments and has even been used for general merriment. Considering it's a simple reply, it was overused for a certain period of time.

Example:

User 1 - You're a dickhead!

User 2 - O Rly?

User 1 - Shut up, you're retarded!

User 2 - O Rly?

See? There's just no comeback to that! It's too stupid!

4. For Me To Poop On

"For Me To Poop On" was coined by Triumph, the insult comic dog, so we know straight away that it must have been comedy gold originally. It has since then been used as a way for people to describe their annoyance of certain places/items/people. For example, someone talking about Fred Durst would say "Fred Durst is a great man - for me to poop on!". At this point, they would pause, waiting for the inevitable "LOLS" to come in from people in on the joke, who are clearly clueless that the original poster was being unoriginal and, to be honest, a bit of a dick, no matter how much we agree.


Let's face it, we'd poop on him too!

Instead of an articulate and intelligent discussion about upcoming movies and what-not, forum users were forced to wade through post after post, each containing this one unfunny line! Seriously, the river styx would be easier to get through than the IMDB forum at the time of "poopularity".

Example:

User1: So, I just went to see Batman and Robin. It was severely dissapointing. I feel that Joel Schumacher took an idea that could have potentially been mind-blowing, and turned it into a camp waste of time. Bat-nipples? Bat Credit Card? Uma Thurman? Why did he fill his film with irrelevant tripe?

User2: Batman and Robin was a really good film....FOR ME TO POOP ON! LOLZ!

User1: That's your input, is it? No discussion about cinematography? Nothing about scripting or the poor camera work?

User2: The camera work was really good.....FOR ME TO POOP ON!

User1 has signed out

3. THIS IS SPARTA!

Apparently just seeing a film and appreciating it doesn't cut it anymore for some people. Quotations from films and television can work in small doses, mainly when you're talking about the piece of media you're quoting. It's easier to make people laugh with jokes you've "borrowed" from professional comedians or a poorly written parody film than it is to use imagination.

"I was in the park, and I was wondering why a frisbee gets bigger over time. Then it hit me!"

"HA HA HA HA! YOU'RE SO ORIGINAL!"

Naturally, quoting films on comment boards and forums for comic effect works well, considering most of the people there will be in on the joke, but at a certain point, you've got to wonder what goes through peoples heads when they think using a line from a mediocre film is funnier than a pie to the crotch.

"THIS IS SPARTA" is roared in the film 300 by an angry Gerard Butler, before kicking an unimportant character into a seemingly bottomless pit. Now, on film, the line works. He's passionate about his kingdom, he is annoyed that this asshole wants to cause trouble on his land. Of course he kicked him down a pit, it was the only reasonable resolution that would bring the argument to an end. However, off screen, it makes no sense. It hit forums like a tidal wave, becoming quite the finishing move. Unfortunately, as stated above, IT DIDN'T MAKE SENSE.

Example:

User1: This video is stupid!

User2: Stupid....THIS IS SPARTA!

User1: No, it isn't!

User2: PERSIAN COWARD!

2. All Your Base Are Belong To Us

In 1989, a videogame side scroller was released called Zero Wing. Primarily, it was a Japan only release until 1992. At that point, the game was translated (fucking badly) and sold in Europe. Of course, the poor translations were so bad, they improved the game severely, mainly because it was hysterical that it became evident that no-one in Japan spoke English at all.

Ironically, it took some time for the offending text to make it to the internet. In 2001 (it's unclear when it became popular), the above meme was released onto the web, prompting a tirade of parodies and similar examples of poor translation.

Examples (either aimed at or used by the referenced character or form of media):

Call Of Duty - "All your history are belong to us"

Sauron - "All your hobbits are belong to us"

Youtube - "All your video are belong to us"

Shakespeare - "All thine kingdom doth now belongest to us"

As you can see, not the most creative bunch of sentences, but nonetheless, right to the point.

Pictured: Literary Genius, not internet moron

1. All Acronyms!

Infuriating, over-used, pointless. These three phrases can apply to all acronyms. What's so hard about writing out a full sentence? Is anyone in that much of a hurry? Be honest with yourself, acronyms like LOL or ROFL are ways of ending a conversation you don't want to be in, paticularly if they're at the end of a message.

Example:

User1: So I said "Hey, you can't talk to me like that!"

User2: Lol

It's subtle, but everyone knows it. LOL is a conversation finisher. That, and an indication that you're too busy to type a reply, e.g when you're masturbating.

Then you pull this face when someone catches you

Back to the main point, it's not that hard to type out what you're indicating with an acronym. LOL is another way of saying "Ha, that's funny" or "I'm laughing for real!". OMG is also an intruiging one, since it's shortening a phrase made up of words that are 3 letters or less. Oh My God. Not that difficult to find on the keyboard.