American Commercialism

America is known as the land of the free. However, based on what the word 'free' usually means, America can't be farther from the Land of it; everything comes with a cost and everyone has a price. &&

Featured: Long term effects of addiction to/abuse of American Commercialism

Just The Facts

  1. Money is one of the dirtiest things in the world. Don't eat if you just paid for the food with bare hands
  2. The more money there is, the less money is worth. 5 dollars in 1930 are equal to about 62 dollars now
  3. Money is the biggest source of evil in the world. But you knew that.

So They Sold You a Life...

How is something free if it has to be paid for? And let it be asked, how the holy fuck is life something that has to be paid for? Personally, I imagine that being painfully pushed through somebody's genitals is enough to ensue your right to life. But what do I know?

Time of birth: 3/9/09 First payment due: 3/13/09

Born: 1/18/10 First Payment Due: 1/20/10

As a product, life is astonishing. Somebody at some point decided 'hey, I could sell this to people,' and this somebody must be the messiah to everybody in advertising. Life as a product would be rediculiously hard to market, especially long term.

Life: Now with Venerial Disease!
Order within the next 9 months and retrieve scrutiny, shame and a new place where most people party inside of a fire for only 88 easy payments of $0.99!


You'll even have to pay for one of these

You'll even have to pay for one of these.

When you go to buy life, you will have your first easy payment of $0.99 in exact change. Come to purchasing it from the old dyke behind the counter, she will tell you that it costs $1.05.
A feeling of violation creeps through your system. Here you had been misled, at least 4 times every TV break, that your life would be paid for in easy 99 cent installments and now you were being demanded $1.05. The feeling this gives you is a major insentive to look for another product. How could you be so used?

You will raise your concerns to the lady behind the counter.

"Well," she'll say, "there's tax."

You'll say tax with a question mark after it then ask what it is.

"Well, tax is money that you use to buy money with." This immediatley will go over your head and you'll ask what the money is used to buy.

"Well, roads, public school, police."

You'll ask what police are.

"Police are people that the government hire to make sure you follow the rules."

You'll ask what a public school is.

"A school is an institution set up by the government to tell you and your children and your children's uglier children the things they think all the children should know in their world."

The people who are giving us wheeled polution machines and finding reasons to send our little boys to go get bullets thrown at them by impoverished foriegners before they allow them to sip alcohol are telling your ugly children what to think? And making you pay for it? Yikes.

You knew what roads were, you're not stupid.

On the subject of the roads built, allow me to indulge you with a personal anecdote:

One time I was driving down a road where everybody was going fast. The road was so smooth and easy to drive on. I approached a hill and stayed in my lane. As I got to the top of the hill, all of the driving lanes disappeared. I was free to drive anywhere. FREE in all capital letters, on five places in the screen, all brightly colored and eye-catching. Anarchy. As I continued up the hill, the lanes reemerged and I was once again confined by simple rectangular paint stains. Each lane led to a steel box with a window. Left with no more choice or freedom, I drove to a booth and was confined inside of it by a camera and a yellow and black bar.

There was another dyke behind the window.

"Hi there, I hope you enjoyed your 20 ft of freedom, that will be $1.05."