As we point out in our recent article on Scientology's latest pet projects, most stars that don't already believe you're an alien rape baby are being recruited by the CoS. Here's how it breaks down:
When we first blew the mother-loving lid off the engram-scrubbing den of Secret Celebrity Scientologists in 2007, we had no idea how widespread the reaction would be. We've had millions of page views, thousands of diggs, and three of our dogs murdered and flung from the back of speeding limos. According to Google, Cracked is the number one place to go for people trying to find out which famous folk are giving it up for L. Ron Hubbard. Which we'd think was great, if only our investigative team hadn't spent the last two years in hiding before they finally got drunk enough to stop worrying about crazy-ass "We will RUIN you AND kill the rest of your dogs" Scientology litigation.