Windex

Windex goes by many names, for extra brownie points with the cute chick at the Grocery store. Ask for Windex using such names as: Blue Gold, Texas Window Cleaner, Squeegee Juice, Squeaky Monkey, Blueberry Shakes and Smurf Jizz.

Smurf Jizz? Third isle? Thanks!

Just The Facts

  1. Windex Wipes were developed for surface cleaning and not to be used for personal hygiene.
  2. The blue-green color of Windex has many similarly tinted mixed drinks after it.
  3. If you are spraying a whole window at once, a general rule is the larger the area, the faster you move.

The Fire-Related History of Windex

Lets start this gangbang off with this interesting peice of windex history.

"When Windex was invented in 1933 by Erich Drafahl, it was essentially 100% solvent, and as a flammable product, it had to be sold in metal cans."

Yes, Cleaning your windows in the 1930's could literally result in your windows catching fire while cleaning with a lit ciggerette.

Windex When Applied To Knees. Circa 1930's

Windex In Popular Culture

I wouldnt call it "popular" or "Culture" for that matter. The movie called "my big fat greek wedding" Commonly refered to Windex as a cure all, and people took it seriously, no really.

Here is an exerpt FTA.

Q In ''My Big Fat Greek Wedding,'' dad Michael Constantine uses Windex to cure ills ''from psoriasis to poison ivy.'' Is it a wonder drug?

A Clearly not. The ammonia-based cleaner is ''extremely caustic,''

I know what your thinking, caustic i bet thats french for delicious. No, caustic means that it eats into soft materials such as plastics and flesh. Such as laptop screen.

Clearly the prime choice for all your skin related cleaning.

Questionable Mental Cognitive Abilities

Teens have been looking to Windex as a cure to acne on Yahoo Answers.

To our less internet savy users. Yahoo Answers is a formidable archive of knowledge with the finest answers the collective mind of internet users can provide.[citation needed]

Favorite answer:"Windex should never go on your skin! If it was to, it would be called Facex."

Obviously!