Comic Book Questions

Willing suspension of disbelief aside, these are the questions about our favorite sequential art form that need to be answered.

He can do this with his penis too right? So how would he and his wife ever manage to leave the bedroom?

Does the Thing haveta, y'know, poop? Is it orange too? For that matter, do radiation powered heroes, well, have radioactive waste?

While we're on the Thing, so to speak, he has a girlfriend. Do they fuck? How? Isn't his dick all orange and made of rocks?

Just The Facts

  1. Comics have existed for over 70 years.
  2. To our knowledge, these questions have never been answered.
  3. Most of these questions are sexual in nature.

I gots my questions!

Does Superman, as Brody suggested in Mallrats, blow his load like a shotgun? Hell, he can blow forest fires out with his super-breath, so he probably unloads at Mach 4.

The Flash. He was married, both the original 40s Flash, and the 50s Barry Allen. So, uummm, how to put this? Were they, ahem, "super-fast" in the bedroom?

I'm not even sure where to begin on this one and no, it's not photoshopped.

Does it make anyone else feel sceevy that the Archie characters are supposed to be 16-17, yet we constantly see things like this

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