Coctail Weiners

The smaller more refined cousins of the common Hotdog or Frank, Cocktail Weiners are packaged meat products who in spite of their diminutive size have successfully found their way into more formal settings as hors dā€™oeuvres.

Just The Facts

  1. Cocktail Weiners are really just small Hotdogs (but they are too secure to feel inadequate).
  2. Most people can put the whole thing in their mouth without choking.
  3. Cock - Tail - Weiner, How could you go wrong?

The Beef on Weiners

A tasty treat often pared with beans or wrapped in bacon or pastry, the Cocktail Weiner is a versatile meat product that is sure to have you coming back for more.

Bite that weiner, bad boy!

Bite that weiner, bad boy!

Smaller than most other tubular meats, the meager Cocktail Weiner makes up for its lack of size with big flavor. No one is thinking about the length of your link when they have sweet goodness dripping down their chins.

Finger lickin' good

As the name implies Cocktail Weiners are often enjoyed with alcoholic beverages at parties and are a favorite for tailgating at sporting events, where your girlfriend can sample your delicious meat behind the stadium.

Two lovely ladies looking for some weiners

They are just as at home with martinis as they are with a beer and can be seen as a universal snack that breaks cultural lines and passes over the lips and into the mouths of some of the most discerning palates.

These guys fucking love 'em

The Case For Smaller Weiners

Where a large Frank or standard size weiner might be considered brutish or even cumbersome, the modest Cocktail Weiner slips in and fills the gap for those looking to have a mouthful of sweet meat while still maintaining the social etiquette and expectations of a more formal setting.

"Oop, almost there..."

Small yet inviting, the Cocktail Weiner is often enjoyed in multiplicity with most dedicated weiner biters being able to handle up to six Wieners at a time. Something when tried with standard size weiners is a tight squeeze at best.

Overdoing it a bit...

Preperation and Serving

Most recipes call for soaking your weiners in some kind of flavorful sauce, and let's face it, who wouldn't want to do that?

Hot Steamy Weiners Soaking in Flavorful Sauce

Another popular method of serving these succulent little morsels of tender pork based heaven is to wrap them in bacon or pastry. Some people insist in having their weiners wrapped at all times and avoid simmering them in the crock pot without some kind of external cover, but to each their own. A covering of pastry is most often referred to as a "Pig in a blanket," and a crispy flaky crust can be both an accent to the flavor and an aid to facilitate in the conveyance of the weiner to your mouth.

Weiners Wrapped And Ready For Action

A true Cocktail Weiner purist will prefer to take them as they are often dripping in their own juices.

Three Small Dripping Weiners

Discrimination

Cocktail Weiners are sometimes referred to as Cocktail Weenies but this is more often than not, a derogatory term used by those that prefer to choke down an awkward twelve inch frankfurter than sample the sweet and savory goodness of the tender and manageable alternative.

Choking down a fat one

Size Queen

The roots of discriminating against Cocktail Weiners based on size goes back quite some time as evident in this 1920s children's book.

Conclusion

In spite of the insistence of some to dismiss them as just little weenies, Cocktail Weiners are not going anywhere and remain a favorite among those who can appreciate the important place a small weiner truly has in the culinary experience. Be it at simple gatherings or at big balls, everyone enjoys having a cute little weiner offered to them.

So serve some Cocktail Weiners at your next party, but be prepared to have enough on hand, they get sucked down fast.

"Little red weeeeeinerrrrrs... Baby they go too fast. Yeah heah..."