Scene Kids

If you've seen someone who appears to have been thrown up by a pink unicorn, it's likely you've spotted a Scene Kid. Characterized by crazy outfits and asymmetrical haircuts, they're here to take over the world in the name of ridiculous bullshit.

An Intro to Scenesters

Chances are you're familiar with the word scene.

"The Punk scene is dying, man."
"I'll get your damn chicken wings, don't make a scene."
"That Christian Bale nude scene kind of sucked."

However, we are referring to "scenesters." Scenesters are kids usually (but not limited to) between the ages of 13-21 who believe dressing like Big Bird will show their keen fashion sense. While claiming to be "about the music," Scene Kids pride themselves on being unpredictable (here meaning find out what people think is "cool" and make fun of it while doing the exact opposite).


Scenesters have existed for ages. Remember that douche who claimed to know everything about your favorite band but couldn't remember any lyrics? That would be a scenester. Scene Kids will usually latch on to a specific genres of music (in this case, it's screamo/electronica/hardcore) and abuse the crap out of it's culture.

Music

The whole premise behind being "scene" revolves around the music. What better way to show you love a band than by wearing a shirt so bright it'll burn your eyes. The typical Scene band is a happy, fun loving group who might weave some screaming into the mix depending on whether they've seen themselves in the mirror or not.


"Wow...I have the sudden urge to scream...a lot."


A man on the forefront of this trend is Gabe Saporta of the band Cobra Starship, a 30-year-old who dresses like he's in preschool, and thinks that this somehow makes you the asshole.

"My mom always said I was special...bitch."

The music typically contains little use of real instruments and is usually made in GarageBand. That's right, becoming a Scene"star" is pretty simple provided you kept your clothes, mannerisms and Playskool keyboard from when you were five, you're set. Though you will still need a band name.

Clothes, Music & Apparel

Shirts tend to be very bright and vary in color. Striped or checkered shirts are also a go. The pants tend to be tight, and feature whatever colors and patterns most make your legs look like an optical illusion.

Apparel includes body piercings from nose rings to gauged earlobes.

GAH!

Vocabulary

Take the word "whatever." Scene-kids use this word a lot when arguing with their parents about their "new look." Because syllables are hard work, they will remove the "er" part and replace it with an "s." Now we're talking! (ironically):

"You look like the Play-Doh monster your five-year-old sister just made"
"Whatevs"

You can even add a z for extra pointz!

Some Vocab Practice:

  • Zommg!- Oh my god! I hit the z instead of the shift!
  • Kiddz- Children!
  • Lollz- Laugh out loud!
  • Rawwwr- Dinosaur sound because I like dinosaurs! They had small brains like me!