Myself

Myself is a pronoun. Famous users of myself include Billy Idol, De La Soul and prominent Australian masturbation-enthusiasts DiVinyl.

Fucking liar.

The Three Stooges line-up had changed dramatically since moving to BET

When I think about you... I shudder

Just The Facts

  1. Can be used reflexively as the direct or indirect object of a verb or as the object of a preposition: "I bought myself a new car."
  2. Can be used for emphasis: "I myself was certain of the facts."
  3. Also used to describe my normal or healthy condition or state: "I'm feeling myself again."
  4. A good alternative to third-person reference for arrogant jerk-offs; "I love myself"

Myself used as an intensive of 'I' or 'ME'

Example: "I myself will challenge the winner!"

Context: Pool. Magic cards. Halo 3. A fight to the death in gladiatorial combat (what I myself like to call Thursday)

Meaning: I'm so fucking bad-ass that whoever wins between you two bumblefucks will earn the right to be beaten into faggotry by me, myself.

Myself

Myself.

Myself used reflexively in place of 'ME'

Example: "I gave myself a good once over."

Context: Masturbation.

Meaning: I'm constantly diddling myself due to boredom, lack of social ability and the fact I've been set about with a fugly bat on several separate occasions.

Wanker.

Never heard of 'the changeup'

Myself used in place of 'ME' or 'I'

Example: "My wife and myself fully agree"

Context: Any question directed at you and your significant other.

Meaning: My wife wears the trousers and is always right. I am a pussy-whipped spineless shadow of a man. I never disagree with a word she says.

Pussy-whipped

Just keep tellling yourself you're in charge.

Myself used to define your normal or customary self

Example: "I'm not feeling great, but I'll be back to myself soon"

Context: Trying to explain why you look/feel/act less than awesome.

Meaning: Trying to imply that your usual self is so much more stupendously awesome than you could ever be, and that on the right day, even superman would be begging to blow you.

"Myself"

Myself.

God just shit his pants.

Reality

Fugly

This image will never leave you.