Men in Black

Men in black

Just The Facts

  1. Men in black is an awesome movie
  2. The movie is a holy relic for ufo everythingists
  3. watching this will make you go insane
  4. from how awesome or retarded it is

The movie

Men in black is a 1997 sci-fi movie about a secret government agency who erase themselves from exsistence (at least as far as the government is concerned, wait, wah?) and try to hunt down and capture a giant space cockroach that stole the galaxy in the form of a necklace, it also stars will smith. do I need to say any more? whatever, just look at the poster and buy the movie

fuck yeah

The actual movie

Knowing the plot doesn't make the plot any more bewildering. The movie starts with Agent K a.k.a Tommy Lee Jones a.k.a that old guy teamed up with his partener agent J a.k.a that really old guy in the first eight minutes who pull over a van of mexican immagrants they suspect has an illegal alien onboard (uh, to easy) they interogate them and then tell them to go on their way, except for one poor soul which he proceeds to pull to the side and CUT OPEN WITH A KNIFE!?!? DID YOU EVER SUSPECT YOU COULD BE WRONG? whatever he wasn't, thank god, as he proceeds to remind him he isn't supposed to be there. The alien then proceeds to do the most logical thing he can think of, ruthlessly charge at an upcoming officer (presumebly wandering what the shit just happened) he then is blown up by Tommy Lee Jones's gun

well you probably could've negotiated...nah blow the fuck out of them

Afterwords K erases J's memory he has to find a new partener. Cut to will smith being observed by the agency along with a bunch of other naval people(after catching a giant cockroach, which is apparently hard to do?). He shows off his skill by destroying the six year old cut out but letting the hostile aliens live

Oh, he's just sneezing!!! next

well he gets the job, and they kill the cock roach. well there's a sequel about a threat from a kylothian named surleena who is in a human disguise and eats people and has metamorphic squid powers and arrrgh! I've already lost 10 IQ points!!!! one last scene though. he hunts down another illegal alien (seriously) who is aparently getting his pregnant wife to a hospital. he then gets the shit beaten out of him by the alien and K turns his head to the whole scene. but then the kid looks like this!!!

pictured: killer

The strangest thing about this scene though (and trust me, that's saying alot) is the parents look just like humans, obviously the woman had some sort of squid affair

pictured: The actual father