Innuendo

The Oxford English Dictionary defines Innuendo as follows: • noun (pl. innuendoes or innuendos) an allusive or oblique remark, typically a suggestive or disparaging one.

Innocent children's movie? I think not.

Fighting crime never felt so warm and soft.

Just The Facts

  1. Innuendoes are not always sexual in nature, but the fact we only use innuendo when referring to our penises and vaginas demonstrates our collective maturity.
  2. Beaver is a double entendre for Vagina. Fact!
  3. Innuendoes have never gotten anyone laid. You're thinking of money.

Innuendo in the Arts or How I Learned to Stop Slapping Little Johnny Under the Nazi Helmet and Really Enjoy Xena: The Warrior Princess.

To truly grasp the scope of innuendo within the arts one must examine the pinnacle of the double entendre. I give you Xena. Xena: The Warrior Princess was a show that lasted far too long and was a source material for many a pre-pubecent boy to enjoy daily. Let's examine a few lines taken directly from the show.

"So how about it? I scratch your back, you stab mine."-- Callisto

"No Cherries were harmed during the production of this motion picture."-- "Comedy of Eros"

"Where'd you get that sword?"
"Oh, actually they say I take after my father in that respect."
"The sword on the table."
"Oh, that sword." -- Xena and Rafe in "King Con"

"If I have to go the rest of my life without companionship, knowing myself won't be a problem."-- Gabrielle in

"My child, you seem a little troubled."
"Troubled is a polite word for what I am."-- Leah and Gabrielle in "Warrior�Priestess�Tramp"

"Let's say the winner gets me-- and a body part from each of the losers."
"What do you mean?"
"A body part. Minimum bet is a hand...You got the jewels for this one?"-- Xena and Ming Tzu in "The Debt II"

"Xena?"
"I'm here, Gabrielle."
"It hurts inside."
"What?"
"Everything's changed-everything."-- Gabrielle and Xena in "The Deliverer"

"Look! Cherries! I love cherries."
"Me too."
"Did I mention I'm a widow?" -- Gabrielle and Draco in "A Comedy of Eros"

"It's gonna smell like fish for days."-- Xena

"I like to be creative in a fight, it gets my juices going."
"Can we cook with your juices?"-- Xena


"I have *many* skills. -- Xena

Nothing is soft as water. Yet, who can withstand the raging flood? -- Lao Ma

Joxer: Wait. Did I smell something?
Aphrodite: Lay off of me, turkey!
Joxer: No. Oh, it's fish!
Aphrodite: I'm new to this mortal hygiene thing!

Joxer: Just check out my shoe size! Ha-ha!

Xena: [to the slaves girls in Gurkhan's harem] All right, girls... We're going on a cruise. Anyone care to come?

Xena: I wish, um...
Gabrielle: What?
Xena: That I had read your scrolls just once.
Gabrielle: You would have liked them.
Xena: I know.


Joxer: "My sword is always ready to pleasure you, my lady."