Willard Scott

Willard Scott has been alive since the dawn of time. He reached fame through his work on television, radio and being infuckingsane. Yet still, he is not well-known today and no one truly gives a shit.&

Willard on the job.

Ronald was originally supposed to be addicted to heroin.

Just The Facts

  1. Willard Scott was the original Ronald McDonald and he played Bozo the Clown. Holy shit.
  2. He now works for the Today Show, where he announces the birthdays of the oldest people in the country.
  3. Willard has clearly found the Fountain of Youth.

Cracked on Willard Scott:

Along with stealing the title of Biggest Fucking Nutjob from Al Roker, Willard Scott also occasionally fills in as the weather reporter of the Today Show. When not making Al cry in his dressing room for taking everything from him, Scott is resident retard on the show, recognizing birthdays of the oldest people in the United States and naming the jelly of the day.

Willard's birth certifcate states he was born in 1934. Upon doing some research, we have discovered that this is about the time he developed dementia and 1934 was the only year he could remember at the time. In the 1950's and 1960's, he played everyone's childhood nightmare, Bozo the Clown before going on to be America's most-recognized fast food mascot, Ronald McDonald. Scott was later named the Most Frightening Man in the United States. When Willard finished scaring the shit out of children everywhere, he moved to work on the Today Show where he scared the shit out of everyone everywhere by being downright crazy. These days he is still scaring all viewers of the Today Show shitless, although he has the most pointless job on the show. He is stationed in Washington, D.C., presumably because none of the core staff of the show want to put up with his antics.

Here's to you, Willard Scott, and today's strawberry jelly.