Tasering
Tasering is the act of using a taser to subdue another human being. The act is often caught on video and said videos almost always sparks serious discussion about police brutality. Did we mention that people getting tasered is almost always funny?
Just The Facts
- Tasering is the next big scare in police brutality
- It's legal to own a personal taser in every state except Hawaii, Massachussets, Michigan, New York, New Jersey, Rhode Island, and Wisconsin
- TASER is actually an acronym for Thomas A. Swift's Electric Rifle
Cracked on Tasering
The taser was developed in 1969 by Jack Cover, a NASA researcher--the same year that man first landed on the moon. We can only assume that on the day of the moon landing, Cover was sent home for showing up to work late and developed the taser as a way of non-lethally going postal on his boss.
Tasering has been all over the news and is the subject of much controversy. In 2004, a six year-old boy was tasered by a school guard in Miami, supposedly to prevent him from cutting his leg with a piece of broken glass. In late 2007, a University of Florida student attained internet fame due to a video of him shouting "don't tase me, bro!" at a police officer (shortly before being tased, several times).
Texas is notorious for its taser use, thanks to the Houston Police Department. In the first two years since they armed themselves with tasers, the HPD used their tasers over 1,000 times. Over half of those instances were routine traffic stops, compaints of suspicious people, and noise complaints.
While we'd like to give the boys in blue the benefit of the doubt, we can't help but think that getting pulled over in Houston goes something like this:
Officer: Sir, do you know why I pulled you over?
Joe Sixpack: Yes, sir. I was speeding.
Officer: Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to calm down.
Joe Sixpack: Excuse me?
Officer (into shoulder walkie): Suspect becoming disagreeable, stand by.
Joe Sixpack: Wha- *BZZZ* AGH HOLY SHIT WHY DID YOU JUST TASE ME
Not all of the incidents in Texas are without cause, however. Just recently, a Travis County Constable deputy tasered the fuck out of a 72 year old grandmother. The shock (no pun intended) you first experience when hearing that a 72 year old woman was tased is natural, but quickly dissipates when you learn that the woman repeatedly disobeyed the officer and dared him to tase her.
Other Things Tasers Can Do:
They can set you on fire.
Tasering on the Web
By far the most popular internet video related to tasing, here is the video of University of Florida student Andrew Meyer getting tased at a Q&A session with 2004 presidential candidate John Kerry (remember him?):
