D Generation X

D Generation X is the most popular group in professional wrestling history. They were cooler than a polar bear's toenails all throughout the late 1990's. They are known primarily for demanding oral sex from anyone who is not down with them.

One of the only non-penis related images that

A noble cause that every American should whole-heartedly support.

 Here is the new incantation of DX being totally hetero.  Shoving a guy's face up your butt is edgy, right?

Just The Facts

  1. The group's original catchphrase, "I got six words for ya...PUT MY PENIS IN YOUR MOUTH!", never really caught on. It was later simplified.
  2. They are responsible for the second most famous crotch chop in American history, after Lorena Bobbit's.
  3. At some point in their lives, every American man between the ages of 18-28 has performed the crotch chop. This was most likely done either in elementary school or while intoxicated.

Formation of a (D) Generation

The year was 1996, and a hullabaloo hurricane was beginning to form within the World Wrestling Federation. In the ring, fans were ecstatic over the deep and passionate feuding going on between the Federation's top stars: Triple H vs. Razor Ramon, Shawn Michaels vs. Diesel, and the 1-2-3 Kid vs. puberty.

It was a vicious battle of epic proportions.

Yet no red-necked, red-blooded American would ever have guessed that all five of these "heels" (bad guys) and "faces" (good guys) were...(gasp).....friends in real life! And to make matters worse, these five guys formed a backstage clique known as....The Kliq. Because if there's one thing about wrestlers, it's that they just can't help but run in packs with edgy misspellings and catchphrases. But instead of coming up with cool catchphrases, The Kliq spent their time influencing WWF owner Vince McMahon about the outcomes of everyone's matches...including their own! These guys were, in effect, directing their own careers at the expense of the lesser names in wrestling and all of the naive fans. Can you even believe the audacity? Fixing the outcome of a physical contest for personal gain? Only in the sleazy world of professional wrestling would this sort of thing ever happen, right?

Oh, right. Nevermind.

In between scheduling themselves to win matches and title belts, BFF's Paul Levesque (Triple H), Michael Hickenbottom (Shawn Michaels) and Sean Waltman (123 Kid, X-Pac) decided that pretty much the neatest thing in the whole wide world would be if they could be buddies on-screen as well as backstage, meaning, let their characters form a "stable" and take the WWF by storm. But, ever the meanie, Vince McMahon decided it would be a bad idea to let these guys break character on television.

You see, wrestling in the 90's was quite a different scene than it is today. These were glory days well before the term "sports entertainment" was invented...by someone sick and tired of defending the physical prowess it takes to get smashed in the face with a steel chair night after night. It was a time when the World Wrestling Federation didn't have to compete with a lawsuit-happy panda over their acronym rights. It was a time where wrestlers stuck to their gimmicks like shit on a fur thong. You were your character, plain and simple. This especially sucked for the Undertaker, who was forced to sleep every night from 1991-1999 in a poorly buried coffin.

"Goddammit you guys, could I trade gimmicks with Val Venis for one night? Please???"

Seeing as Vince McMahon was pretty set in his decision, it is safe to say that D-Generation X would have never existed if it wasn't for an earth-shattering event known worldwide....on Wikipedia....as"The MSG Incident". This surprisingly has nothing to do with the pork fried rice I ate while writing this, and everything to do with a house show at Madison Square Garden where the Kliq said "gimmicks be damned!" You see, Scott Hall and Kevin Nash were about to leave the WWF for WCW. Michaels and HHH wanted to give these guys the sendoff they were due, and decided that the best way to do that would be through a solid bro-hug.

Madison Square Garden: birth of the bro-mance?

Naturally, McMahon was furious that his actors, I mean wrestlers, broke character in front of thousands of people. It didn't help that someone caught the whole thing on video. Or the fact the Michaels and HHH used that video as a tool to incite McMahon (on screen!) to allow them to form their alliance.

Judging by the fans reactions, McMahon decided to break his own rules and allow these two degenerates to form a partnership. Three months later, a nation of adolecents wearing $20 licensed T shirts were running around and throwing the DX crotch chop at parents, teachers, playground rivals, and anyone else who tried to tell them what to do, or what to wear. Just try not to get pumped when you hear this intro. I dare you. Oh, and no matter what your buddy's older brother told you, it's not Rage Against the Machine singing the theme. That would have just been too 90's-perfect. Also, did anyone know that this song actually had verses?

Break it Down

So...for most wrestling fans, the history of DX can be broken down into three categories: The Early Days ('97-'98), The Glory Days ('98-'00), and The WWE Is Losing Ratings So Let's Bring Back DX For A While Days ('02-present). The original lineup of DX consisted of the leader, the Heart-Break Kid Shawn Michaels, with his right hand man Triple H. Also in their corner was the DX "insurance policy", the formerly-"Ravishing" Rick Rude, who never wrestled but sure did carry a mean-looking briefcase. Rounding out the foursome was the fearsome leather-clad bodyguard Chyna. When Chyna was first introduced into the WWF, she was known as "The Ninth Wonder of the World." This was because nine out of ten fans wondered whether or not she had a penis.

Take your best guess, fellas.

At first, Vince McMahon agreed to the formation of this group under the stipulation that they would perform as "heels". They would be bad guys who undermined authority, feuded with legendary respected wrestlers, and made lewd references to the massive size of their manhoods. It is truly baffling that McMahon could not predict that these antics would make DX the most popular group of all wrestling federation/entertainment-related time. These guys (and girl?) went over like a Led Zeppelin....and not the metaphorical "lead zeppelin" that Robert Plant was referring to when naming his band, but the Led Zeppelin that still gets played every 8 minutes on classic rock stations around the country.

Before long it became clear that, despite his moniker, Rick Rude was just not rude enough to hang with DX. He was dropped from the stable without explanation. For years to come, Rick Rude struggled to find work outside of DX.

He quite possibly may have gone on to endorse Oxi-Clean.

The now-three-member DX got along just like peas and carrots....and carrots....until Shawn Michaels had to go and hurt his back. Triple H blamed Michaels' departure from DX on the fact that Michaels had "dropped the ball" on the Mike Tyson incident of a few months prior. You see, before Mike Tyson became the poster boy for lisps, ear-biting, and horribly stupid tattoos, he was briefly a member of DX. Because nothing screams "degenerate" like being associated with Mike Tyson.

"Degenerate!"

With Shawn Michaels out of the picture, Triple H became the leader of DX. But because it looks totally lame to be the leader of a group which consists of only one other person, Triple H invited a few new members into his stable. This included none other than the 1-2-3 Kid, fresh from an unsuccessful venture with WCW. Since he needed to be cool, and 1-2-3 X-Kid was far too long a name, Sean Waltman returned to the WWF under the nonsensical moniker X-Pac. Also among the new members of the DX Army were the tag team partners The New Age Outlaws, consisting of The Road Dogg Jesse James and The Bad Ass Billy Gunn. These were the glory days of DX. As a five piece unit, DX was now poised to become ultra-super-popular, and would run shit all over the WWF for years to come. Two years, to be exact.