Dawn Of The Dead

Dawn of the Dead is a 1978 zombie Film tells the story of a group of survivors seeking shelter in a mall after a zombie pandemic. oh yeah did I mention the mall is filled with freaking zombies!!!!. Hilarity and sexual tension ensues.

Is it just me or does the guy on the left look like Richard Pryor?

Gandhi ponders life's many mysteries also. . .BRAINS!!!!!!!!!!!

Deep down all Ken wants is a hug.

Just The Facts

  1. Dawn of the Dead is part of George A. Romero's Living Dead series.
  2. The film's setting has been recreated in video games, comics and fat people's wet dreams.
  3. The film also established biker's as the most retarded people on the planet.

How to Fuck up you're impenetrable fortress. A guide.

1# Leave all the best guns in the gunstore. (seriously they don't even hurt zombies).

2# Let the one of two trained soldiers in the mall completely lose his shit. Sure he's seen some bad things but he'll get over it!!!

3# Make sure to spend all you're time dressing in fancy clothes and playing videogames and not fortifying the mall until the only thing that get's in or out of that place is Ken Foree's terrifying laughter.

4# Leave the (pregnant) woman alone so she can be attacked by a guy in a dress. seriously.

5# Get overun by Tom Savini. Honestly it's Fuckin Tom Savini. What's he gonna do? pour unrealistic Its-not-that-red-looking fake blood on you.

6# Get bitten and shot several times Then lead the zombies to the secret entrance. Asshole!

There you have it, follow those 6 simple steps and you'll have zombies crawling up you're butt-hole in no time!

The Remake.a.k.a THE FUCKERS CAN RUN!!!!!!!!!!!

In 2004 a remake was released directed by Zach Snyder. There were several changes. There was no Roger, Peter, Francine or Stephen (Although Ken Foree and Scott H. Reiniger make memorable cameos) No helicopter, we saw a little of life before the infection also THE FUCKERS CAN RUN!!!!!!!!!

Rather than retell the original's story the remake follows new character Ana,a nurse that has hair of variable length (see-shower scene) There is a wider group of survivors. There is-

Ana-See above.

Kenneth-Kenneth has a shotgun. don't fuck with Kenneth.

Michael-Everyman and croquet enthusiast.

Andre-Repentant gangbanger (the best kind).

Luda-Andre's wife.

C.J-Badass Mallcop with a badass moustache.

Terry-Boy scout.

Bart-Resident idiot.

Nicole-Hot nubile youngster.

Norma-Badass grandmother.

Steve-Sarcastic guy who bones Monica.

Monica-Gets boned by Steve.

Tucker-Hillbilly trucker (There's always one)

Frank-Nicole's father.

Andy-Crackshot and all-round Badass.

Chips-Nicoles dog and all round asshole.

The escape plan in this film is the same as the three cops in the first-Get a boat and get to an island. They arrive and all is good until Chips (asshole) tucks tail and runs. A buttload of zombies come sprinting towards them. Man's best friend my ass!

The two films shows us two very important things. When the shit hits the fan society breaks and people will kill each other for material objects that don't even matter, and that when the zombies do come we are fucked because THE FUCKERS CAN RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!