If your reading this and you think all Scottish people look like willie out of the simpsons then read on. Its not all about drinking, drugs and kicking fuck out the English. At least not untill the weekend.

Get your Haggis right here! Chopped heart and lungs boiled in a wee sheep's stomach! Tastes as good as it sounds!

Good day too bad we lost

Why would not trust this man he's a judge

Just The Facts

  1. Scotland is a country of the United Kingdom (not just an English City) also Irish are alright.
  2. The western highlands of Scotland have an annual rainfall exceeding 3,000 mm.
  3. Scotland has hunderds of inventions inventions such as the Television, telephone, video cassette recorder, finger printing, home of golf, tarmacadam, tyres, penicillin even the US Navy.
  4. Edinburgh was the first city in the world to have its own fire-brigade.
  5. The Bank of Scotland, founded in 1695, is the oldest surviving bank in the UK. It was also the first bank in Europe to print its own banknotes.
  6. Edinburgh, like Rome, was built on seven hills. That must mean something.

Were too find us (basically just google Earth us.)

Scotland is one of the four countries that make up the United Kingdom. Scotland Borders England also part of the UK along with Wales, (England's bitch) and Ireland Scotland's old Friends and allies. Scotland also borders the North Sea, the Atlantic Ocean, the North Channel and Irish Sea. Scotland also has 790 islands, including the Northern Isles and the Hebrides.Scotland also has large oil reserves which are one of the largest in Europe. The country is known for its ancient castles, Stunning lakes and Lochs, high mountain peaks and historical monuments.

Great Scottish actors

Scotland have some great actors some have made it very big and even got the leading roles such as; Sir Sean Connery Dr. No (1962) .... James Bond , Ewan McGregor Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith (2005) .... Obi-Wan Kenobi and Gerard Butler 300 (2006) .... King Leonidas.

Some of are Actors have found stardom being the bad guy such as Brian Cox Troy (2004) .... Agamemnon X2 (2003) .... William Stryker

But the role that suits Scots perfectly is the role of a Scotsmen. A wonder why ?

Great Scottish People

There truly is too many of the fuckers a dont no were to start so have a look yourself

a couple you might reconise. a say might.

billy connolly Colin McRae Robert Burns

Why am proud to be Scottish


Being Scottish is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or ,aTurkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.

And the most Scottish thing of all? Suspicion of all things foreign!

Only in Scotland can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

Only in Scotland do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in Sotland do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a DIET coke.

Only in Scotland do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.

Only in Scotland do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.

Only in Scotland do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

Only in Scotland are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink.


3 Scots die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.

142 Scots were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.

58 Scots are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.

31 Scots have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.

19 Scots have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate.

Scottish Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after Xmas cracker-pulling accidents.

18 Scots had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.

A massive 543 Scots were admitted to A&E in the last two years after trying to open bottles of beer with their teeth.

5 Scots were injured last year in accidents involving out-of-control Scalextric cars.

and finally...

In 2000 eight Scots were admitted to hospital with fractured skulls incurred whilst throwing up into the toilet.

SCOTLAND - Love it, or Leave it!

How we are potrayed and why we dont give a fuck.

Most other nations see us pretty much as drunken mad men who would fight you just cause your not scottish and sometimes just because you are Scottish and well what can a say you proberly right.. Some Scots are Nutters but frendly nutters, before they kick your head in they will buy you a pint and after it they will point you in the direction of a hospital.

Scottish Music

We Scots love are music and others Scots are mostley famous for Folk, Celtic , gaelic, but we also have many sensational rock, pop, and BAGPIPES,BAGPIPES, BAGPIPES is that all you think weve got fine heres some Bagpipes.

some english guy at a wedding

Bagpipes were not even invented by the ScotsThe first documented bagpipe dates to a 1,000BC Hittite carving from modern Turkey, and the Roman emperor Nero allegedly played one (he did there awsome). Bagpipes spread through the near east, Europe and the Mediterranean, and are traditional instruments for folk music in fucking dozens of countries.

Heres a couple of songs by the big yin!

What you would benefit from a holiday in Scotland

Scotland is a great county with stunning views and lots of friendly people (mostly drunk) there are the odd few whom arent so friendly mostly police officers.


Awsome Georgian and medieval districts, along with Edinburgh Castle and Arthur's Seat, an extinct volcano, Edinburgh is a capital city famous for the great architecture, fine museums , art and getting stabbed.....repeatedly ,,,,,,mostly fatal.


Glasgow is one of the most modern cities in Europe. The city has been reborn as a centre of style and vitality and livelines. but still full of outstanding Victorian architecture. Glasgow has world famous art collections, the best shopping in the United Kingdom outside London, and a vibrant and exciting nightlife(on a street coner wi a bottle of buckfast) thats one of the best in Scotland but beware go up town in Glasgow you may never come back.