I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell
Need a book to change your life but tired of the positive thinking bullshit. "I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell" is the most important book a college student could read. It has changed lives all over America. Tucker Max is a genius.
Just The Facts
- A copy can be found in the room of every college frat boy
- It has been on the New York Times Bestseller from 2006 - 2008
- They made a movie based on it
- Tucker Max has had more action then you, your college slut and your college rapist combined
- Tucker Max was never with a fraternity
Tucker Max : The Man Behind the Legend
Tucker Max has grown from being a simple story teller to a folk hero among college men. His stories have been passed on from frat boys to champions. Any thing you have ever wanted to do, Tucker Max has done it and in ways you could not have thought of your self. But were dose the fantasy end and the reality begin?

Tucker Max, the man behind the myth
So here are some important truths to know about the legend that is known as Tucker Max.
First, he is good looking. Any one who could appricate hotness would realize that Tucker Max is one of the sexeist writers of our time. How else could he have the life he writes were it not for his good looks. He is so good looking that he even fucked Miss Vermont.
Second, its true that he is a fucking genius, he went to Duke Law School. They have 13 professors at Duke who have won the Noble Prize. You know who else went to Duke and is fucking famous. Among them are:
- Richard Nixon - former US President
- Ron Paul
- Elizabeth Dole - Got dick from a presidential candidate
- Malinda Gates - Gets dick from the richest man in the world
If you don't know who they are then look them up, after all you were questioning Tucker Max's source of genius.
Back to why he is a genius, all that experties has allowed him to escape any crminal charge from drunk in public to when some dirty slut (like Carie Prejean) accuses him of slander. It helps to go to law school and Tucker Max went to one of the best law schools.
Its important to understand that Tucker Max is not invincible. Sure he drinks a lot but that means he has a stronger tolerance to booze and he is Irish. But Tucker Max has faced death so many times that next time they meet, Tucker Max will be tea bagging the grim reaper. He can also kick any ones ass, so long as that bastard dose not have a gun.
Some (virgin men, economic girly men and extra-fat feminist chicks) have called him a "rapist", which is just insulting to a man of his talent. Its true that he has fucked more women then any other man but he had to work for it. You see most college boys are lazy and try to get pussy by raping bitch's. Rape is for desprate frat boys who are too lazy to work for a piece of ass and too cheap for a hooker. Also rape is illegal and uncool.
Tucker Max can seduce any women with his good looks and charm. That is why he is a champion at what he dose.
The Bible of Frat Boys
I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell has become the offical Bible or college frat boys. A copy of the book could be found in every frat boys room. It is the only book they purchased that was not for school. It also proves that America's college youth can read.
Every frat boy has read this or is in the process of reading it at the moment. Not having read this book or seen Animal House has become an act of blasphamy in a frat house (punshable by tea baging). Seriously what kind of senstive sissy do you have to be to not wanna read this book. Are you a virgin?, senstive cry baby?, illetrate?
Those who have read I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell could understand and relate to its genius. Tucker Max (like James Bond) is someone who we want to be. Any dude would love to have a career that requires you to bang women, get drunk and bragg about it.

This is what college men are intrested in
Its espically hard for college students, who are forced to read boring overpriced text books or novels that explore all that senstive sissy shit (that requires a tampon when reading). Hence, I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell, has become an escape from all that sissy shit and allows men to explore being men.
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College men do not give a shit about this
It also actually gets college men to read. An entire generation has become hooked on reading thanks to Tucker Max. Maybe now all those sissy senstive virgins and sissy moral advodcates could stop shitting them selves about the future.
If your a man and you have a problem with I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell then you obvioulsy are a disgrace to the man race.
I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell (The Movie)
Yeah that is right. They made a movie of I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell.

Ok so it did some what poorly, but on the bright side it will encoruge frat boys to read more rather then watch a movie. Movies are fucking exspensive. Some time its not worth it if some asshole brings their 4 retarted kid and won't traqulize them so they shut up for the film.

These things do not belong in a theater
Fratire - The Genre for Men
Are you looking to explore a genre that is all about understanding ones humanity and challenge the accepted norms of masculinity in this so called "culture of rape". Do you seek a genre of literature that has its readers seek their inner sensitivity and maybe allow one to be more open to the world?
If your answer is no or "I'm not into that sissy shit" then you will love fratire.
This new genre of literature which was founded by Tucker Max and Maddox (Author of The Best Page in the Universe). This genre allows men to read books that they could relate to with out all that political correctness - sensitive bullshit that you see on TV (except for Fox News).
A genre of literature has been created that is all about beer, women, guns, cars, and all that other manly stuff that college men care about with a mix of humor and none of that political correctness sensitive sissy shit that your overpaid college professor tries to cram down your throat.
The irony is that neither Tucker Max nor Maddox were ever in a frat. Yet they are now worshiped like hero's in every frat house in America. Except for Skull and Bones, this sissy frat that produced George W. Bush and John Kerry still has a policy of circle jerk only.






The a*****e totally wrote this article and, irony of ironies, the Duke-College-Boi can`t f*****g spell for shit.
ReplyRape and sex are unrelated. You have no concept of what either are. If you think that rape (an act of horrific violence) is in any way sexy, or even okay, then, joking or not, you are a terrible person.
ReplyYou know when people talk about an "asshole", "douchebag", and "horrible human being", and you wonder if the guy they're referring to knows how horrible he is?
You're that guy.
I call Bullshit! Tucker Max wrote this article. Cheeeaterzzzz!
ReplyMy head hurts from trying to read this article. try spellchecking next time. its the button with the check mark and the "abc" printed on it.
ReplyI actually find Tucker Max really funny, but this is possibly the dumbest, most poorly written article I have ever read on this site.
ReplyHah, "Tucker Max is one of the sexist writers of our time."
ReplyWell yes, that too. I like the man, and I don't really give a s**t what percentage of his hilarious stories are true.
I'd say perhaps Cracked should employ some sort of basic spelling exam before letting just any dumbass write an article, but I don't really get why these stupid Topic things exist anyway. We have Wikipedia for a reason, stick to writing humorous lists.
I've heard from multiple sources who know Tucker that the guy is a total doorknob and that his stories are about 40% true.
ReplySweet spell checking in this article, numbnuts. Was this written by monkeys, or is there a joke I'm missing here?
hahahahaha
Tucker Max was outed for the liar that he is.
ReplyPlease leave the frat fart typo in.
ReplyI have a hard time believing Tucker Max and Maddox were never "in a fart"