Comb-Overs

Going bald? Don't worry! As long as you still have that outer strip of hair there's hope! And nobody will ever notice! Really, we promise.

And nobody's the wiser!

Just The Facts

  1. The popularity of the weave has virtually wiped out the already endangered female comb over.

Why Comb Over?

Anybody with a full head of hair (or even a bald person with a shred of dignity) would probably well ask themselves why would anybody with eyeballs and a mirror would do this to themselves. Well in truth it's kind of death by degrees thing. Imagine that one morning as you get ready to leave the house and notice a bald spot. It's not big, miniscule in fact. Naturally you panic but soon notice that by brushing some of still thick and lovely hair in a slightly different way that it completely covers the spot. There you go! No need for a fake tupee or expensive hair plugs, just comb and go about your day.

Well this works at first but the funny thing about bald spots is that they have a tendency to get bigger. Not suddenly mind you, just a little tiny bit more each day. So you just comb a little more, convincing yourself it's not any more noticable than it was before. Flash forward a few years and you've got this:

Denial is a powerful thing, and a comb over is quite possibly the ultimate in masculine denial. Some are so transparent that you really can't help but think they must be doing it as a joke. But talk to them for a minute and you realize that deep down they may know it's obvious but they refuse to let go of the hope that there's somebody, anybody that doesn't know it's not a full head of hair.

The Classic

The standard comb over takes longer hair from one side of the head and combs it over to the other side(hence the name of the entire look). Interestingly almost all combovers go from right to left (that's from the perspective of looking at the idiot with a the comb over head on).

The Comb Forward

This type of comb over isn't nearly as common, however the most famous comb over is of this type. Donald Trump, one of most of the prolific douchebags of the last 30 years sports this look, and extremely publicly. In fact he shows a tenacity on the level of cockroach when it comes to not going away.

The Enemy of the Comb Over

There is one arch nemesis of the comb over and that is a stiff wind. A comb over may be mascarading as short hair but as discussed it is in truth rather long hair from only one side of the head. Like all long hair a good strong wind can wreak havoc. Observe:

Even the most famous comb over from the king of "don't touch the hair" is not immune to the power of the wind: