Top 6 Most Bad Ass Ways To Die
Sure. you could have a nice long life, maybe even getting up to your 90s, having a nice family, a nice house, and then one day die in your sleep. Or you could do something awesome and die like a mother f%*&er!!
Just The Facts
- There are 1.78 deaths per second
- Everyone will die
- Only a few will go out in style
#6- Piranhas
They’re one of the most ferocious fresh water fish in the world. If you fall in the river and can’t swim, you’re dinner. This is an insane way to die because it’s a combination of drowning and getting eaten alive by a bunch of fish with razor sharp teeth.
#5- Threesome
Sex by yourself. Awesome. Sex with someone else. Amazing. Sex with 2 other people. Well lets just say chuck norris ain’t got shit on that. But to die going at it with 2 beautiful women (men for the ladies…or midgets for Captain Kirk) is just a fantastic way to go out. This Guy in Russia thought so
#4 - Flying Battle Axe
Picture yourself as a soldier during a “Braveheart” type battle setting. Now, imagine running full speed at your enemy with either a sword, a battle axe, a club with nails sticking out, a battle mace, a herring, etc… I bet you are picturing yourself kicking ass with one or all of those weapons. Everything is going great, then bam! your dead. You opted not to wear a helmet to the fight, and you are now dead by a flying battle axe. That fucker threw that thing clear across the battlefield, and being the lucky bastard you are, it hit you right in the skull. That is most excellent ( Remember Kids, hitting YOURSELF > with the ax, is never cool)
#3 - Stabbed in the face by a Blue marlin
You’re in Florida, it’s sunny and 90º, and you just hooked a huge blue marlin on your fishing trip. You fight the fish for an hour, it’s gigantic, you have it right next to the boat and you’re about to catch it. You’re gonna stuff the son of a bitch and put it above your fireplace, your life is pretty sweet. Bam!!! The fish launches out of the water with a ferocious leap and stabs you right in the dome! You die.
#2-Eaten By A Pack Of Velociraptors
you just got your new time machine in the mail, and want to try it out. You want to see some real life Dinosaurs, So you go back to the making of the first Jurassic park movie!, and get your face eaten off by a raptor just like your good friend Muldoon (from Jurassic Park), did. I remember when I first saw that scene I stood up and saluted Mr. Muldoon after he was eaten. Not to mention this is probably the scariest way to die on this list.
#1 - Godzilla Cats!
#1 - You create a massive ray gun that will burn out the sun bringing on a REAL "Dark Age turning cats into Godzilla monsters that eat humans!
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Stopped being funny after number 6, but I enjoyed the video.
ReplyThis Topic had potential.
ReplyFunny. But nothing beats demerolin'til you can't "beat it". A la Michael Jackson, you know?
Replywhat about "a la willis" you know? having to stay behind to activate a damaged bomb designed to destroy an asteroid headed for earth.
ReplyI was just thinking about that last night, after i had masturbated, but before the sweet oblivion of sleep had claimed me. What an awesome way to die, blowing up an asteroid in order to save the world. My question is why was Steve Buscemi disqualified from the strawdrawing for the right to do that? Was there a doubt that he would go through with it? Knowing that you are mortal, yet the immortality of fame requires someone left alive to infame you,(i just made that word up) would you hesitate to die in such an awe-inspiring manner? Even insane, the choice between instant deification and facing a possible afterlife of every person ever being pissed at you is an easy one. In short, Buscemi got screwed. And Affleck sucks.(not news, but bears repeating.)